December 31, 2015

Power Rankings: Top 30 Twin Cities Tweeters Of 2015

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Two years ago, in a half-joking response to City Pages publishing a "Top Twin Cities Twitterers" article, I came up with my own rankings. Despite stirring up incredible controversy and ruining many friendships I did it again last year. And now "third annual" makes it sounds like an actual thing, so here we are. Below you'll find my updated rankings for 2015 in which I continue to say "Tweeters" instead of "Twitterers." To anyone not on the list, you were No. 31 and just missed.

(Note: @BJFait was ruled ineligible for this list by virtue of her eyes being too pretty and her hair smelling too good, but following her on Twitter is one of the best decisions I've ever made.)


Neuman Twitter1. @RandBallsStu (Steve Neuman)

The Sportive co-host. Twinkie Town blogger. Good date for Jason Isbell shows. Tried to burn my house down with a Heggies pizza. Unparalleled commitment to bits.


Berry Twitter2. @_omgigi_ (Gigi Berry)

On loan to Georgia temporarily. Baesgiving hostess. Beard whisperer. Knows every local team's win total based on Papa John's discounts. Elite-level emojis and rants.


Wessel Twitter3. @DanaWessel (Dana Wessel)

GO-96.3 morning show co-host. Responsible for nearly every Donkey Kong high score in Minnesota. Has given me multiple pictures of himself as presents.


Petersen Twitter4. @JimPeteHoops (Jim Petersen)

Wolves television analyst. Lynx assistant coach. Brilliantly mixes old-school scouting and new-school stats. Responds to tweets mid-broadcast. Was nice to my mom once.


Krawczynski Twitter5. @APkrawczynski (Jon Krawczynski)

Minnesota's best all-around sportswriter. Smart, funny, plugged-in, even-handed, open-minded, and interacts with readers in a meaningful way. Underrated as hell.


Swamptown Twitter6. @CSwamptown (Clarence Swamptown)

The Sportive co-host. Spectacular forearms. Hates everything and everyone except Kelly Clarkson and Teddy Bridgewater. Straddles the line between insane and genius.


Floyd Twitter7. @mfloyd21 (Melissa Floyd)

World's nicest mean person or meanest nice person. Angelina Jolie of Mom Twitter. Known to make it rain with oatmeal packets. Emett and Olive wrangler. Fixit master.


Floyd Twitter8. @floyding (Zach Floyd)

Last year's No. 1. Hasn't slipped, but his wife threatened me with bodily harm over a repeat because his head got too big. Brad Pitt of Dad Twitter. Shadow recruit.


Hageman Twitter9. @ParkerHageman (Parker Hageman)

My favorite Twins writer when not busy fathering children. Constantly building dreams together and standing strong forever. No Juice co-host. GIF machine.


Manthei Twitter10. @HollyManthei (Holly Manthei)

Notre Dame and World Cup soccer legend. Surly beer hype woman. Hug distributor. Once brought a sleeping bag to a party at my house. Chilaquiles photographer.


Zanatta Twitter11. @Mike_Zanatta (Mike Zanatta)

Minnesota's most underrated tweeter. No one offers a superior combination of sports snark, pop culture humor, and glorious hair. Looks like Ginsberg, tweets like Draper.


Nora Purmort Twitter12. @noraborealis (Nora Purmort)

Still Kickin with incredible strength, grace, and humor in the face of personal tragedy. Mom to the world's cutest toddler. Writer of a new memoir you should pre-order.


Robson Twitter13. @brittrobson (Britt Robson)

Minnesota's best basketball writer. Timberwolves historian. Right about most things and more willing than most to admit when he's wrong. Great accent.


Rand Twitter14. @RandBall (Michael Rand)

Star Tribune digital sports editor, blogger, and silliness ringleader. I've met most of my friends in his backyard. Never played the game. New hair style is out of control.


Niver Twitter15. @tniver (Tim Niver)

St. Paul restaurant mogul. Twitter host with the most. Owner of Strip Club, Saint Dinette, and soon Mucci's. Thrives in the murky waters of late-night Twitter.


Ampersandria Twitter16. @ampersandria (Ampersandria Cochran)

Impossibly quirky and likable. Modern-day Jackie Kennedy, but with more Cheeto dust.


Lambert Twitter17. @MeatSauce1 (Paul Lambert)

KFAN morning show co-host. Never not trolling. Andy Kaufman/Yoenis Cespedes combo.


Brown Twitter18. @ItsTheBrandi (Brandi Brown)

Stand-up comedian. Coder. Tracker of people discovering the origin of Flo Rida's name.


Halter Twitter19. @mspbjHalter (Nick Halter)

Minneapolis/St.Paul Business Journal reporter covering the sports and restaurant beats.


Shortal Twitter20. @janashortal (Jana Shortal)

KARE-11 reporter. Once defeated me in a "crush contest." Justin Bieber stole her look.


Albus Twitter21. @jalbus (Jason Albus)

Photographer to the Twitter stars. Melissa Floyd wrangler. Lived up to the hype.


Jones Twitter22. @bianca101 (Bianca Jones)

Powerful name, huge smile, tiny human. Constantly amazed at things I've never done.


Brauer Twitter23. @dbrauer (David Brauer)

Minnesota's top caller of media-related bullshit. My go-to sounding board for grievances.


Guentzel Twitter24. @LindsayGuentzel (Lindsay Guentzel)

WCCO radio. One of only five humans my cat isn't afraid of. Cheats at staring contests.


Rupar Twitter25. @atrupar (Aaron Rupar)

Ex-journalist now in politics. Drummer. Fellow cat guy/beardo/Timberwolves masochist.


Welle Twitter26. @LizWelle (Liz Welle)

Paul Allen's favorite tweeter. Wore a beard of coffee grounds to be Drake for Halloween.


Matteson Twitter27. @solace (Kyle Matteson)

Just ceased being a frog. Lives, breathes music. Has an answer to almost any question.


White Twitter28. @amanduhwhite (Amanda White)

Real life is her live album. Twitter is her studio album. Randall Cobb fan club president.


Hummel Twitter29. @TweetsByCollin (Collin Hummel)

Way too good-looking to be this weird and into cats, but Twitter is (mostly) better for it.


Bonnes Twitter30. @TwinsGeek (John Bonnes)

Has wasted more than 500 hours of my life recording our arguments about the Twins.


If you read this whole thing and still won't follow @AaronGleeman on Twitter you're a monster.

July 5, 2013

Link-O-Rama

• News story lead sentence of the week: "A bizarre incident at a McDonald's drive-thru involving a bare-breasted woman and caramel led to the woman being arraigned."

Baseball America is publishing Byron Buxton porn now.

• In response to my post about the Twins signing 16-year-old Lewin Diaz for $1.4 million, swing mechanics expert Bobby Tewksbary broke down the video and compared him to David Ortiz.

Gilbert Gottfried as Walter White is just dumb enough to be funny.

• As a longtime Google Reader power user who relies on constantly updated RSS feeds to do his job I was crushed when it went away this week, but I'm slowly rebounding with Feedly.

• Not mentioned on this "Most Popular Date Ideas By City" list is Minnetonka: Chinese takeout and "Blue Valentine" on Netflix.

• On this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode we unfortunately predicted exactly how the Josh Willingham injury situation would play out and examined the Kyle Gibson hype meter.

• I generally think Conan O'Brien on television is hit or miss, but his internet videos are more often than not really funny:

And my favorite O'Brien thing is the "Conan O'Brien Can't Stop" documentary, which is on Netflix.

Joe Mauer, on moving to a new house with his pregnant wife: "I've been told I'm a hoarder."

Glen Perkins thinks the Twins should be using him more often in non-save situations, which is exactly what I wrote here not so long ago. He probably has a better chance of convincing them.

• Here's an example of the type of e-mails that get sent to the HardballTalk contact address. We write about baseball, by the way.

Jim Thome was unable to land another major-league job at age 42, so he joined the White Sox front office as a special assistant to the general manager.

• There's something funny about the Twins' television announcer implying that people who watch games on television don't know as much as people who watch games at Target Field.

• On a related note, I've gone to a bunch of Twins games recently and luckily spotted this.

• Holding up signs at baseball games always seems silly to me, but I'm making an exception.

• I really liked Britt Robson's lengthy, reasoned analysis of the Timberwolves beefing up their offense and ignoring their defense.

• My weekly half-hour appearance on KFAN with Paul Allen was pushed back to Friday because of the holiday and we were joined by Paul Charchian. I explained Mase to them.

• I'm almost finished re-watching all six seasons and 86 episodes of "The Sopranos" and this is by far the saddest moment.

• One of the best "The Sopranos" moments that I'd forgotten about was Christopher Moltisanti quoting "Born To Run" in a scene with Bruce Springsteen's bandmate Steven Van Zandt:

With all that New Jersey and all that Van Zandt, how did Springsteen avoid making a cameo?

• So you wanna work in baseball, huh?

• On a recent "Gleeman and The Geek" episode I talked about being nostalgic for typewriters and according to the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel "typewriters are surprisingly hip again."

• Just a super chill Twitter bro offering up his thoughts about baseball and life to me.

• Two-and-a-half years after leaving the Twins for the Dodgers and a three-year, $12 million deal Matt Guerrier was traded for Carlos Marmol in a swap of unwanted contracts.

Tami Taylor was amazing, but it turns out that Connie Britton is pretty great in real life too.

• One of the better Twitter conversations of all time. Just happy to be a small part of it.

• Never forget that Karl Pilkington is the best.

• "Stop Podcasting Yourself" is my favorite podcast and it's especially good when hosts Graham Clark and Dave Shumka are joined by a guest with as much silliness as Caitlin Howden.

Jon Dore was a fun guest on "Who Charted?" with Howard Kremer and Kulap Vilaysack.

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Darin Mastroianni girlfriend"
- "Ways to approach a 39-year-old daughter to lose weight"
- "Bret Saberhagen net worth"
- "Are Aaron Gleeman and Dana Wessel the same person?"
- "Fox Sports North Girls last name"
- "Drinking alcohol while on the elliptical"
- "Is Kyle Gibson right-handed or left-handed?"
- "Ron Coomer strip club"
- "Jim Thome shirtless"
- "Sid Hartman still alive"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is "Leaving California" by Shawn Smith:


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