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• Baseball is nice and all, but I think I've finally found my sport.

• I wish Otis Redding would come out with as much post-death material at Tupac.

• Thankfully they didn't print any of my personal information. How embarrassing.

• Just by walking down the street Chrissy Teigen shows why supermodels are supermodels.

• As you might expect, Bruce Springsteen's eulogy for Clarence Clemons was pretty amazing.

• If forced to guess which female cast member on The Office was formerly an NFL cheerleader every single person would be wrong.

• Dave Chappelle took all the time he used to spend being funny and used it to work out.

• Jim Riggleman sure knows how to celebrate being fired. And now he's my colleague. Sort of.

• Don't let the Sports Illustrated poll fool you: LeBron James stinks at baseball.

• Being traded to Cleveland probably isn't much fun post-James, but it's tough to feel too sorry for Omri Casspi these days.

• Weird question (that reveals too much about me) of the week: Do you ever lie while getting a haircut?

• I recently finished re-watching all five seasons of The Wire and even the second time around it was so amazing that I started to get angry with just a handful of episodes remaining. I also came to the realization that my fashion sense is the exact same as Dukie's. I'm not sure what the best way is to convince anyone who hasn't yet watched The Wire to take the plunge, but here's a video of every epigraph from my favorite television drama of all time:

As the great Lester Freamon put it: "All the pieces matter." What a f***ing show.

• In the latest installment of "other media members reacting to  Sid Hartman doing things" an amused Dana Wessel is joined by a delighted Phil Mackey.

• For several reasons Tanguay Ngombo will go down as the most David Kahn draft pick in the history of David Kahn draft picks.

• I e-mailed this link to my mom, who remains the world's biggest Kevin Garnett fan, and she replied: "She might just be a friend and he just forgot his ring on his nightstand."

• Much like the person in this story, whenever a nude, redheaded actress drunkenly knocks on my hotel room door in the wee hours of the morning my immediate reaction is to call security.

• Lindsay Lohan is doing great, as usual.

• David Eckstein isn't even playing, yet he still leads the league in "grit and desire."

• As a big Party Down fan, my hopes are officially up.

• OK, now this whole government shutdown thing is getting serious.

• After watching his various appearance this week I'm in favor of making Louis CK all-time talk show guest, like all-time quarterback. Here's part one of his Jimmy Kimmel Live interview:

His segment on The Daily Show was hilarious too and if you don't laugh at those two videos we probably can't be friends. Also, watch his show on FX.

• This week's reminder that I went to journalism school.

• Cheick Kongo's crazy knockout of Pat Barry at last weekend's UFC event is the equivalent of a baseball team scoring 10 runs with two outs in the bottom of the ninth inning to win 10-9.

• Locally trained MMA fighter Brett Rogers couldn't beat Josh Barnett at the Strikeforce event two weekends ago, so instead he beat up his wife.

• On his podcast Joe Rogan repeatedly warned that he likely couldn't pass up the ridiculous money they were offering, so he's back as the host of Fear Factor.

• Before last week my only experience with Brazilian food was gorging myself at a steakhouse, but I'm officially a fan of the cuisine after eating at Samba in Hopkins.

• Recommended podcast of the week: Rob Delaney (the stand-up comic, not the former Twins pitching prospect) was a great guest on "Jordan, Jesse, Go!"

• Last weekend I was at a local baseball tournament where they raffled off a game-used Luis Rivas bat, which longtime AG.com readers will hopefully find as funny as I did. At one point the announcer told the crowd: "There haven't been many sold, so pretty good chance you'd win."

• Another old friend, J.C. Romero, has found a new home with the Nationals ... at Triple-A.

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is Tom Waits growling his original The Wire theme, "Way Down In The Hole":

• If a 76-year-old talk-show host can't find life-long happiness with his three-decades-younger seventh wife, what chance do the rest of us have?

• Ben Roethlisberger doesn't sound like such a great guy. Also, I predict "DTF" name-tags start showing up in bunches at clubs across the country starting this weekend.

• KSTP-1500 has officially become ESPN Twin Cities, with Tom Pelissero and friend of AG.com Phil Mackey doing quality work on the revamped website. In addition to the usual radio stuff they're pumping out Twins articles and funny videos like this one featuring Patrick Reusse. In fact, if his article about Francisco Liriano's start yesterday is any indication Mackey might be the first local writer to combine traditional reporting and sabermetrics on a regular basis.

• Speaking of Liriano yesterday, here's my take on arguably his most impressive performance since Tommy John surgery.

• The Situation and his Jersey Shore cast-mates are doing a fine job milking their 15 minutes of fame. Last week he appeared in an amusing commercial alongside Mets third baseman David Wright and this week they're posing with Bar Refaeli.

• How is Cameron Diaz just like Franklin Gutierrez?

• Dave Chappelle crawled out from whatever rock he's been under and immediately went for the high degree of difficulty jokes:

"Caught me sleeping."

• Not only did Twins third base coach Scott Ullger screw up by waving J.J. Hardy home to get thrown out at the plate by about 30 feet Sunday, he probably cheated in the process.

• Longtime Minneapolis Star Tribune columnist and current MinnPost contributor Doug Grow has written a new book entitled We're Gonna Win, Twins! which "chronicles a half-century of Twins baseball, season by season."  He interviewed me for one of the chapters, so even if you're not into tons of great content about the history of the Twins you can check it out just to read my usual babbling in book form.

• Josh Beckett is marrying a NASCAR-loving rocket scientist.

• I haven't done a weight-loss update in a while, so ... I'm down 60 pounds since February 1, although sadly the pace has slowed to a crawl over the past couple weeks. I'm hoping adding more late-night workouts on the elliptical machine while watching Dodgers games announced by Vin Scully can jump-start things, since boredom often cuts my sessions short. And as you'll soon see, I have plenty left to lose.

• Aimee Mann vs. Ice-T, on Twitter. Who ya got? Incidentally, his "go eat a hot bowl of dicks" comeback is fantastic even if it is sort of copying a Louis C.K. bit.

• Three years after his terrible Twins stint, Ramon Ortiz is still in the majors and still stinks.

• This story in the Minneapolis Star Tribune caught my attention because a) I was expelled from the after school/night classes at the same school once upon a time and b) quoted in the article is one of my classmates back then, Leora Maccabee.

• I didn't take any pictures while in the press box for the Target Field opener Monday because I was told not to, but some other people took photos with me in them and passed them along. First, here's me on the field during batting practice standing next to Seth Kaplan from FOX:

Here's me standing behind the real reporters (Joe Christensen, Kelly Thesier, Kelsie Smith) as they interview Jim Thome:

And here's a kind of "Where's Waldo?" shot of my section of the massive press box:

Good times.

• Baseball player by night, toilet paper-shopping superhero by day. Or something.

• One of my favorite television critics, Tim Goodman of the San Francisco Chronicle, appeared on Bill Simmons' podcast this week to discuss Conan O'Brien's surprising move to TBS.

• I'll probably post another reminder later, but I'm scheduled to be the guest on Travis Aune's podcast Monday night at nine o'clock. I'm not really sure how it happened, but at this point I'm seemingly one of the few Twins bloggers without a podcast. Laziness, probably.

• Best of luck to Joe Schmit as he begins cancer treatment.

• Some of the highlights from my NBCSports.com blogging this week:

- Phillies may not hand closer duties back to Lidge right away
- No ligament damage, so Montero due back in 4-6 weeks
- Ortiz benched against Liriano
- Another year, another slow start for Teixeira
- Rangers haven't ruled out Feliz starting
- Blue Jays see $10 million shortstop Hechavarria as 'the total package'
- Back injury sends Angels closer Fuentes to disabled list

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is Crash Kings doing "Mountain Man" live: