December 31, 2013

Power Rankings: Top 30 Twin Cities Tweeters Of 2013

twitter follow me

City Pages ran an article by Maggie LaMaack ranking the "Top 20 Twin Cities Twitterers" among non-mainstream media and non-celebrities. She did a very nice job on the piece, which included artsy caricatures of each person and lots of fun quotes, but my Twitter obsession won't let me go on living without posting my own ranking. Mine is slightly different in that I refuse to use the word "Twitterers" and anyone is eligible, but it's the same basic idea. Oh, and I chose 30 instead of 20.


wessel twitter1. @DanaWessel (Dana Wessel from 96.3 K-TWIN)

So funny that it's worth putting up with his soccer fandom. Great taste in roommates.


randball's stu twitter2. @RandBallsStu (Randball's Stu from Twinkie Town)

Writer of the brilliant Uptown dating/Twins bloggers parody. Possibly our best doofus.


hageman twitter3. @ParkerHageman (Parker Hageman from Twins Daily)

Terrible taste in beer. Questionable taste in friends. Excellent baseball analysis.


lamaack twitter4. @MaggieLaMaack (Maggie LaMaack from L'étoile and City Pages)

Writer of the list I'm ripping off. Got a real good Aubrey Plaza vibe going. Too huggy.


rand twitter5. @RandBall (Michael Rand from the Minneapolis Star Tribune)

Weird internet enabler. Editor of Modern Jumpsuit Enthusiast Quarterly. Pug owner.


weisenberger twitter6. @foyobli (Megan Weisenberger from Minneapolis Beards)

Strip club aficionado. Beard curator. Mimosa consumer. Former volleyball superstar.


perkins twitter7. @glen_perkins (Glen Perkins from the Minnesota Twins)

One of the best relievers in baseball. The only Twin Cities athlete I follow on Twitter.


welle twitter8. @LizWelle (Liz Welle from Legends)

Burrito and whiskey lover. Essentially perfect except for being a KFAN/podcast groupie.


ampersandria twitter9. @ampersandria (Alexandria from Airplanes)

One of the funniest people on Twitter. Can really rock a poncho. Mediocre bingo player.


nelson twitter10. @nnelson9 (Nick Nelson from Twins Daily)

Single and looking to mingle. White rapper. Has been kicked out of VFW karaoke.


ugh twitter11. @heidi_ugh (Heidi from Helping Old People)

By far the funniest member of her family. Fell asleep within two minutes of meeting me.


krawczynski twitter12. @APkrawczynski (Jon Krawczynski from the Associated Press)

Hardest-working man in Twin Cities sports media. Really good. Not on "The Office."


white twitter13. @amanduhwhite (Amanda White from City Pages)

"Parenthood" analyst. Blonde-dating snob. Online bully of Aaron Rupar.


guentzel twitter14. @LindsayGuentzel (Lindsay Guentzel from 96.3 K-TWIN)

Stella's regular. Outstanding mid-90s acoustic sing-along partner. Pizza roll bringer.


bonnes twitter

15. @TwinsGeek (John Bonnes from Twins Daily and "Gleeman and The Geek")

I dunno. Whatever.


sauce twitter16. @MeatSauce1 (Paul Lambert from 100.3 KFAN)

Taste worth acquiring. Parking monitor. Troll baiter. Hanukkah cookie eater. Hadouken.


brauer twitter17. @dbrauer (David Brauer from MinnPost)

Knower of all things local media. Multi-time podcast guest. Oldest college student ever.


butler twitter18. @kateMbutler (Kate Butler from 100.3 KFAN)

Wild and Gophers reporter. Producer. Morning show regular. Dook-shoer. Sleepy baby.


miller twitter19. @MillerStrib (Phil Miller from the Minneapolis Star Tribune)

Twins beat reporter. Probably the best Twin Cities baseball writer. Jerry Sloan survivor.


mandy twitter20. @mandyapolis (Mandy Lee from Terrible OK Cupid Messages)

[Borat voice] My wife. [/Borat voice].


wolfson twitter21. @DarrenWolfson (Darren Wolfson from KSTP-TV and 1500-ESPN)

Other hardest-working man in Twin Cities sports media candidate. My former babysitter.


rupar twitter22. @atrupar (Aaron Rupar from City Pages)

Amanda White's online punching bag. Timberwolves sadomasochist. Beardo.


marthaler twitter23. @jmarthaler (Jon Marthaler from "The Sportive")

Ring-leader of the Twin Cities' filthiest podcast. Unrelenting sports fan. Soccer weirdo.


gigi twitter24. @_omgigi_ (Gigi Berry from Wherever Unicorns Are From)

Lover of nugs and beards. Frequently turnt. Goes back and forth regarding my worth.


than twitter25. @thanland (Than Tibbetts from Public Insight Network)

Keeps this blog running. The only person I met in journalism school and didn't hate.


mitich twitter26. @JohnnaMitich (Johnna Mitich from The Best Advice I Ever Got)

Filled in as "Gleeman and The Geek" producer once before I realized she was so funny.


gibson twitter27. @actuallyerin (Erin Gibson from Hip Hop BBQ Radio)

Mid-90s rap connoisseur. Claims to like brunch. Irish whiskey drinker. Soccer weirdo.


matteson twitter28. @solace (Kyle Matteson from Every Concert Ever)

Fastest favorite draw in the Upper Midwest. Music fiend. Brunch paparazzi. Beardo.


bollinger twitter29. @RhettBollinger (Rhett Bollinger from MLB.com)

Twins beat writer. Lane Kiffin superfan. Mediocre bowling alley trivia player.


gellner twitter30. @MarneyGellner (Marney Gellner from FOX Sports North)

My mom's favorite person. Upon meeting me, said: "You're not as weird as I expected."


If you read this whole thing and still won't follow @AaronGleeman on Twitter you're a monster.

September 20, 2013

Link-O-Rama

Nick Punto had his most Nick Punto moment ever, sliding head-first into first base on a single to the outfield. Randball's Stu may have to update his oral history of Punto's head-first slides.

Baseball America's article naming Byron Buxton as their minor league player of the year is essentially porn for Twins fans.

• "Breaking Bad" fans will enjoy this Yelp page.

• As an embarrassed, longtime BlackBerry user I can safely say most of these reasons are bullshit.

• My blog-mate Craig Calcaterra showed why I almost never call into radio shows when invited.

• There's a ton of dead weight on the Twins' roster, so who will they get rid of this offseason?

• Thanks to everyone who attended the "Grand Drunk Railroad" event Saturday. It was a major success, as more than 100 people joined the light rail pub crawl in the afternoon and the group continued to have fun at night despite the Twins-Rays game being delayed by rain, thanks in no small part to Glen Perkins buying us a round of beers from the bullpen. It went so well that we'll definitely do something similar again and we're already brainstorming other get-together ideas.

• We recorded this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode at various stops along the pub crawl, so it features multiple special guests and everyone getting progressively drunker/weirder as the show goes on. I already posted a bunch of videos and photos from the event on the episode page, but here are a couple more pictures of the podcasting in progress:

pub crawl podcast

We're recording a new "Gleeman and The Geek" show this weekend at New Bohemia's inaugural beer fest, where a taster pass gets all-you-can-drink beer from 10 different breweries.

• More people will probably click on this link than watched the Astros on CSN Houston.

Chiara Atik of How About We explains why I'll never stop tweeting at Jon Taffer.

• One of my rules is that whenever Lizzy Caplan appears on a talk show I'll link to it.

• During my weekly half-hour chat with Paul Allen he grilled me about a first date, I complained about getting a ticket driving to the studio, and we brainstormed questions for Terry Ryan.

Todd Helton is one of the most productive home hitters in baseball history, but Coors Field is all over the list.

• After six years as Minneapolis Star Tribune editor Nancy Barnes left for the Houston Chronicle.

Conan O'Brien playing "Grand Theft Auto" made me also want to play the game without a clue.

• I have no idea how to handle this emotionally.

• One second on the internet is plenty of time for anything.

• In real life Jonathan Banks is very different than the Mike Ehrmantraut character he played on "Breaking Bad." But he's no less fun to watch.

• After watching last week's "Breaking Bad" episode I wondered on Twitter what happens if no one ever tells Huell he can leave that room now and it turns out someone did the research:

I watched that for ... well, longer than I'm comfortable admitting.

• This conversation started at 1:30 a.m.

• Uh oh. It turns out NBC has had a hidden camera in my office this entire time.

• One of my favorite stand-up comedians, Gary Gulman, is performing all this weekend at the comedy club in the Mall of America.

• Netflix recommendation: "Starlet" is a well-done, small-scale story that avoids the usual movie cliches and features two really strong lead performances by unknown actresses.

Alison Agosti is always one of my favorite podcast guests and she was great on "Hey, Teens!" with Eric Gosselin and Jon Wiener.

• "Parks and Recreation" writer (and former AG.com commenter) Harris Wittels had a funny, interesting chat with Marc Maron.

• Two of my favorite podcasts joined forces when Graham Clark from "Stop Podcasting Yourself" was on a live show with Jesse Thorn and Jordan Morris from "Jordan, Jesse, Go!"

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Byron Buxton's mom"
- "Grand Drunk Railroad"
- "How did Meatsauce from KFAN lose weight?"
- "Nick Punto head-first slide"
- "Ben Grieve net worth"
- "Jim Souhan is the worst"
- "Gillian Jacobs introvert"
- "Connie and Aaron play me"
- "Tevin Campbell radio interviews in 1999"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is "Humpty Dance" by Digital Underground:


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August 30, 2013

Link-O-Rama

• Sunday afternoon "Gleeman and The Geek" will be broadcasting live from the Minnesota State Fair at the KFAN booth near the grandstand. We're doing an extended two-hour show from 4-6 p.m. and there are bleachers set up so people can hang out, eat food, and watch the show, so it would be great to to see some podcast listeners and blog readers there.

• I've had a running bit on Twitter this season in which I tweet out "Glen Perkins, proven closer" after he converts a save. It's part appreciating how great Perkins has been and part mocking the silliness about the Twins needing a so-called "proven closer" when they traded for Matt Capps. Perkins and his wife Alisha Perkins have done a lot of charitable work with the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation and now they're selling "Proven Closer" t-shirts to raise money:

Proven Closer shirt

As you can see, in addition to the "proven closer" label it also features a sketch of Perkins zipping up his fly, which he did mid-save earlier this season. I think it's a funny shirt being sold to benefit a great cause by a pair of good people, so I highly encourage everyone to join me in buying one.

UPDATE: I think this midnight conversation shows everyone's true colors perfectly.

• I defy anyone to find a better video of me hitting a milk carton for home run with a bowling pin in someone's kitchen.

• Remember the various fake movies that were featured in "Seinfeld" like "Rochelle, Rochelle" and "Prognosis Negative"? Someone went and made posters for all of them.

• Does a concussion mean it's time to move Joe Mauer away from catcher?

• Every row of this picture from 2001 adds a new dimension of fun. Row 1: Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake. Row 2: Jennifer Lopez and Chris Judd. Row 3: Jimmy KimmelTriumph The Insult Comic Dog, and Carson Daly. Row 4: Fred Durst. What a time to be alive. I started blogging the next year.

• I've been conducting similar experiments for years, but a lot more data needs to be collected.

• I'd love to hear the story being told by the guy in the middle wearing a Twins jersey. Based on his act-out and the reaction of the woman sitting next to him it seems like a great one.

• Reds second baseman Brandon Phillips freaked out at a reporter and angrily mocked him for one of the few physical traits that society hasn't deemed off limits.

• On a related note, I really liked Will Leitch's article about the athlete/reporter power struggle.

• I have a couple openings in my "Hardball Dynasty" league on WhatIfSports and the new season begins next week. If you're interested in joining, please read this first.

• My favorite scene from this week's "Breaking Bad" was the waiter offering table-side guacamole during an extremely tense meal, so imagine my delight when the actor, Guy Wilson, reached out to me via Twitter to say he's a fan of my writing. Worlds colliding!

• Speaking of great "Breaking Bad" scenes from this week, remixing Hank and Marie watching Miley Cyrus is what makes the internet so wonderfully stupid:

That's just good internetting.

GIF magic, starring Troy Tulowitzki and Jose Fernandez.

• As mentioned on this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode, I hung out in Uptown until 4:00 a.m. Saturday night. Part of the festivities involved seeing Vikings fullback Jerome Felton at Bar Louie around 1:00 a.m. He couldn't have been nicer to my group of drunken doofuses, answering stupid questions about Christian Ponder and, as the bar closed and we exited together, giving out high-fives and hugs. And then 36 hours later the NFL suspended him for substance abuse.

• I had a discussion about this topic Saturday night, so this website comes in handy.

• In addition to recapping my late evening, on this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode fill-in producer Kate Butler set me straight about what may or may not be a turn-on for women.

Michael Baumann of Grantland wrote a good article about Justin Morneau that captures a lot of my same feelings on the subject.

Marlon Byrd was traded by the Mets on "Marlon Byrd t-shirt night."

• I'm very late to the party, but after recently discovering Jason Isbell's music I've downloaded every song and am pretty much listening to him non-stop. He's coming to Minnesota in October to play the Varsity Theater--where I saw stand-up comedians John Mulaney and Carmen Lynch be hilarious this spring--and I think we should all go. Together, even, if you know me in real life.

• Just missing the cut at No. 25: "Wanna try to get a date on the radio at the State Fair?"

• St. Cloud Rox employee Michael Johnson found some footage of our party bus outing in June.

• This week's reminder that I went to journalism school.

• One of the more mind-boggling responses to criticism that I've ever seen: "I've got a wall full of plaques from various writing awards in my home office. If you'd like I can list them for you."

Alan Sepinwall interviewed "Parks and Recreation" creator and former baseball blogger Mike Schur about his new show, "Brooklyn Nine-Nine." Schur is great and the cast includes longtime AG.com favorites Chelsea Peretti and Andre Braugher, so I'm really looking forward to it.

• As usual, I feel the same as Larry David.

Alex Karpovsky is one of the best things about "Girls" on HBO and Netflix just added a few of the movies he wrote, directed, and starred in. Definitely worth checking out.

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Jerome Felton girlfriend"
- "Terrible Gleeman"
- "Whatever happened to Joel Zumaya?"
- "Heavy guy diet failure"
- "Why did the Twins sign Mike Pelfrey?"
- "Gilbert Gottfried depressed on Howard Stern"
- "Robin Tunney socks"
- "Paulie Walnuts hair"
- "Dana Wessel and Randball's Stu obsessed with Link-O-Rama"

• Finally, in honor of Felton this week's AG.com-approved song is "Ridin" by Chamillionaire:


This week's blog content is sponsored by Ticket King, a local ticket broker that doesn't charge check-out fees, offers in-store pickup, and specializes in Twins tickets. Please support them for supporting AG.com.

August 16, 2013

Link-O-Rama

Wanna see Jared Burton punch Brian Duensing?

LaTroy Hawkins, who's getting another chance to close again at age 40, got hit in the bollocks. And yet he still won't wear a cup.

• "Doctor offers free plastic surgery in exchange for dream dates" is a story that has me curious about the blogger equivalent.

• And speaking of the blogger equivalent, "burglar left bruised and bleeding by retired 72-year-old boxer" is a pretty great headline.

• How good has Oswaldo Arcia been as a rookie and how good can he become long term?

• While searching for a photo to use for that Arcia post I stumbled across this beauty featuring Arcia, Brian Dozier, Trevor Plouffe, and FSN sideline reporter Jamie Hersch.

Francisco Liriano is so busy throwing complete games for the Pirates that he has neither the time nor the energy to bother with hitting.

• And because he can't be any worse than Liriano in that last video, Parker Hageman of Twins Daily might take an at-bat against Glen Perkins. I want to be there to podcast the magic.

• Happy birthday to Official Fantasy Girl of AG.com Mila Kunis, who turned 30 years old. It's all downhill from here, trust me.

• On this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode we again learn that John Bonnes isn't needed.

• Oh nothing, just Nick Punto hitting a homer and then doing a postgame interview with a Punto jersey-wearing Danny DeVito on the field at Dodger Stadium:

Punto does kind of have a Charlie Day vibe.

• It turns out not all Bar Mitzvah parties are created equal. Way back in 1996 my party featured basketball and swimming rather than a full-scale burlesque show. We did have pizza, though.

• I'm thinking of applying to the Twins' "social media suite" for the free food. And also because the application asks for a count of Twitter followers, Facebook friends, and ... LinkedIn connections.

• During my weekly half-hour chat with Paul Allen he welcomed Cory Cove into the KFAN studio to tag-team mock me for winning a bunch of money playing poker at Canterbury Park. And then I threw Nick Nelson under the bus to save myself.

Jeff Sullivan of Fan Graphs wrote a very good article about the Twins pitching staff's historic inability to generate strikeouts.

Carson Cistulli of Fan Graphs chatted with one of my favorite baseball beat reporters, Derrick Goold of the St. Louis Post Dispatch.

• And speaking of MLB beat reporters, Deadspin's efforts to identify the best and worst covering each team was kind of disappointing in that they left the worst spots blank a lot.

• Congrats to former "Gleeman and The Geek" guest Ben Goessling, who left the St. Paul Pioneer Press to become ESPN's new Vikings beat reporter. Newspapers continue to hemorrhage talent.

• Wanna be the Minneapolis Star Tribune's new Vikings beat reporter?

• According to a University of Georgia study 28 percent of journalism school graduates wish they'd chosen a different field, which actually doesn't sound all that high to this non-graduate.

Jonathan Abrams' article about Jonny Flynn for Grantland is a must-read for Timberwolves fans, David Kahn haters, and people who simply enjoy shaking their head in disbelief.

• St. Paul Central graduate, Ricky Rubio fan club president, stand-up comedian, and "Parks and Recreation" writer Joe Mande is finally doing something with his life.

• I'm almost finished re-watching "The Sopranos" and by far my favorite part has been getting to re-hear Paulie Walnuts pronounce "Baja Fresh" again:

I laughed as hard at that two days ago as I did 10 years ago and can't explain why in either case.

Rickey Henderson's high school yearbook picture from 1976 is spectacular.

• For my fellow insomniacs, Allie Shah wrote about the struggle to sleep for the Minneapolis Star Tribune, including how "young people, in particular, might be setting themselves up for future problems because of their round-the-clock devotion to mobile devices and social media."

• I really hope everyone listened to me and signed up for the light rail pub crawl/Twins game on September 14, because just look at this shirt.

• Mazel tov to the Phillies for releasing Delmon Young, who refused an assignment to Triple-A.

Manny Ramirez is probably done after being released from Triple-A by the Rangers, but don't forget what a monster he was for 15 years.

"Blue Valentine" is one of my 10 favorite movies, so I was incredibly excited for Ryan Gosling and director Derek Cianfrance's second collaboration, but "The Place Beyond The Pines" was underwhelming. Not bad, certainly, but also nothing special overall. Another fairly new release that I rented this week, "Mud" starring Matthew McConaughey, was much better.

• As someone who obsessively watches "Chopped" on Food Network and obsessively listens to podcasts, chef Alex Guarnaschelli's interview with Marc Maron was amazing. She quoted "Bull Durham" and talked about listening to Notorious B.I.G. and is basically a perfect human.

• "Doodie Calls" with Doug Mand and Jack Dolgen is always funny/weird, but Annie Lederman was a particularly great guest.

Alex Rodriguez, as explained by detective Frank Pembleton.

• If you're into supporting worthwhile projects via Kickstarter check out Hunter Weeks' "feature-length film about the oldest people in the world and their lessons for living life right."

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Jim Thome naked"
- "Jim Thome shirtless"
- "Lean Cuisine chicken enchilada suiza makes me sweat"
- "Brendan Harris attitude"
- "Otis Redding baseball cards"
- "Tevin Campbell radio interview"
- "Mae Whitman pornstar lookalike"
- "Who is Dana Wessel?"
- "Bar graph showing pork chops and mutton chops"

• Finally, because I've listened to it about 100 times in two weeks despite not being sure if I love it or hate it this week's AG.com-approved music video is "Reckoning Song" by Asaf Avidan:


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July 26, 2013

Link-O-Rama

Glen Perkins was definitely right: Converting a save with his fly down did guarantee him a spot in Link-O-Rama.

• I've spent most of the past couple years counting calories, so this photographic look at what 200 calories worth of various food looks like was fascinating.

• If you're going to have "fields of marijuana plants" worth $4 million Hinckley is as good a place as any, just because of the proximity to the donuts at Tobies.

• Friend of AG.com Alex Belth combined Greg Maddux and Al Green, which you know I loved.

• Speaking of which, I just realized that YouTube has my favorite album of all time available in full. You should listen to it, many times.

• Reading about how various people at the New York Times didn't appreciate or even respect Nate Silver hit a lot of familiar notes about old-school media.

• I've been wearing "dad jeans" for years, so it's good to see fashion trends are catching up.

• If this works I'm requesting that Otis Redding play at my birthday party next year.

• On this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode we talked about Scott Diamond's demise and the notion of clutch, and then I revealed my plans to kill middle infielders via time travel.

• Official Fantasy Girl of AG.com candidate Aubrey Plaza does a remarkable job making me want to see her new movie:

She also gave some amusing answers in a GQ magazine interview.

Parker Hageman of Twins Daily talked to Twins stat-head Jack Goin about what exactly goes into the trade deadline.

• Do the Twins even have any players other teams will want at the trade deadline?

• When it comes to Derek Jeter it's hard to tell the difference between news and fan fiction.

• Apparently a "specialty whiskey and craft beer store" is coming to my neck of the woods, which might suggest I've gotten a second job as a city planner.

Justin Morneau's out-avoiding slide Tuesday night must be seen to believe.

Samuel Deduno chewing on his necklace mid-pitch also go the GIF treatment.

• While at KFAN for my weekly half-hour appearance on Paul Allen's show I saw psychic/nutcase Gary Spivey roaming the hallways, but didn't have the guts to snap a photo of his ridiculous hair.

• On a related note, PA's preseason plan to bet $100 on the Twins in all 162 games has shown a $74 profit through 99 games. I have a spreadsheet tracking it and everything.

Chris Colabello might be pretty good if the Twins give him a chance.

• As someone who doesn't care about steroids, this was an amusing collection.

• Terminally ill "The Simpsons" co-creator Sam Simon is giving away his vast fortune to charity.

Geraldo Rivera made weird headlines this week, but one key thing to remember is that he got beat up by Frank Stallone on Howard Stern's show back in 1992:

Rivera was only 49 years old back then, so he wasn't yet the old 50 or the new 50.

• I'm going to ask for this look at Great Clips next time.

Never forget: "Kevin Correia pitching like an ace right in front of our eyes."

• Re-watching "The Sopranos" update: I looked up Johnny Cakes on Wikipedia and learned that the actor killed himself in 2008. Lots of sad, premature deaths among the show's great cast.

Jon Dore has become one of my favorite guests on the podcast circuit and he was lots of fun on "The Crabfeast" with Ryan Sickler and Jay Larson.

Bill Simmons did a nice job interviewing Anthony Jeselnik, who's gotten famous enough that his biggest claim to fame is no longer being Gregg Rosenthal's college roommate.

• Friend of AG.com Axel Kohagen makes the case for "End of Watch" as a horror movie. Sort of.

• I'm going to the Society for American Baseball Research convention in Philadelphia next week, so if any AG.com readers are going to be there let me know.

• Unlike the Twins last night I remembered having a really good time at Safeco Field when I was there in 2006, so I looked up this excerpt from my SABR convention recap.

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "What happened to Drew Butera?"
- "Twins blogger Aaron"
- "Stepped on the scale get even fatter"
- "Notes to twin babies"
- "Justin Morneau shirtless"
- "Famous Jewish women celebrities"
- "Ryan Braun penis"
- "Matt Capps net worth"
- "How much do the Fox Sports North Girls make?"
- "Jon Taffer hair"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is "If I Loved You" by Delta Rae:


This week's blog content is sponsored by the Twins Daily light rail pub crawl/Twins game, where you can join Aaron Gleeman, John Bonnes, Parker Hageman, Nick Nelson, and Seth Stohs for a day of bar-hopping and baseball on September 14. Space is limited, so book your spot.

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