AaronGleeman.com

• This is a great New York Times correction: "An earlier version of this article misstated the name of Howard Stern's bulldog. It's Bianca, not Bernice."

• Mila Kunis took a break from her Official Fantasy Girl of AG.com duties to save someone's life.

• They told me to bring the stats, so I unleashed some sabermetrics (to the tune of Steely Dan) on KFAN with Paul Allen yesterday. You can listen to my entire appearance here.

• Almost every supermodel claims to have been unattractive in high school, but based on their yearbook pictures almost every supermodel is lying.

• Torii Hunter took a leave of absence from the Angels after his 17-year-old son was arrested and charged with sexual assault of a child following a months-long investigation.

• Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist, great teacher, and awesome person Chris Ison was badly burned in a propane explosion, but thankfully is now recovering well.

• Not since Brett Favre has a legend coming out of retirement been such a sad idea. On the other hand, maybe that's just the 12-year-old me who had the original version talking.

• Last week's Gleeman and The Geek episode featured my mom's podcast/radio debut. Hilarity did not, as they say, ensue. And she claims to have been trying to sound like Lauren Bacall.

• My fellow Friday Night Lights fans will like this compilation of Coach Taylor warning people that he has something to tell them:

Let me tell you something: That video somehow makes me miss the show even more.

• On a related note, Coach Taylor's television daughter seems to be doing well post-FNL.

• As always my MinnPost colleage David Brauer analyzing local radio ratings is a must-read. Among the interesting notes: KFAN has the No. 1 or No. 2 rated show among male listeners in every time slot.

• On a related note, KFAN's overall ratings rank No. 9 among all sports stations in the country.

• I look forward to running into Michelle Beadle at the NBC holiday party. Also, congrats on getting away from Colin Cowherd.

• As an NBC homer I'm extra happy that they renewed Parks and Recreation, Community, 30 Rock, and the highly underrated Parenthood.

• Once again, Penn State seems like a wonderful place to spend your college years.

• Jon Hamm answering advice questions submitted by teenage girls is pretty great, and as usual when not dressed as Don Draper he's repping the St. Louis Cardinals.

• Speaking of which, if John Slattery co-stars as Andrew McCutchen this movie will be great.

• One of my favorite basketball writers, Zach Lowe of SI.com, writes about the return of vintage Kevin Garnett at age 36.

• If you haven't been following the Sarah Phillips story, it's a weird one about fake identities, Twitter followers, ESPN, and gambling.

• Ozzie Guillen explains, via video, that he's quitting Twitter because "people out there are nasty" and "I'm not Kim Kardashian":

I'm sad to see him go, because Guillen's tweets were pretty great, but he's basically right.

• Who are the Twins considering with the No. 2 pick in next month's draft? I'm glad you asked.

• Thing that makes me feel elderly: Kerry Wood is retiring.

• David Letterman and Conan O'Brien get together to talk Jay Leno.

• After hundreds of Link-O-Rama posts over the years I'm amazed this has never happened.

• Chelsea Peretti might be my all-time favorite podcast guest regardless of the show, so not surprisingly she was great recently on Sklarbro Country and You Made It Weird.

• Worlds colliding: Will Leitch was a guest on Julie Klausner's podcast to chat about Fargo.

• It was fun while it lasted, but I certainly understand.

• Congrats to friend of AG.com and original baseball blogger Jay Jaffe for his new SI.com gig.

• Drive is on Netflix streaming now, so I'm planning to re-watch it over and over again until I figure out why so many people loved it.

• Car update: I bought a new Honda Fit on February 27 and it took me until May 9 for the little 10.6-gallon gas tank to be empty for the first time. I drove a total of 315 miles in 73 days.

• If you're interested in advertising your product, service, business, or website on AG.com I'm taking "sponsor of the week" reservations through the All-Star break. Click here for details.

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is Ellie Goulding's live version of "Lights":

This week's blog content is sponsored by PickPointz, where you can make predictions, pick games, and win prizes for free. Please support them for supporting AG.com.

• I'll be on 1500-ESPN radio tonight from 7-8 talking Twins and other stuff with Darren Wolfson, so tune in or listen online.

• Carl Pavano was targeted in an extortion attempt by a high school classmate who claims to have had a relationship with the Twins pitcher and it gets even crazier from there.

• Who are the Twins' top five prospects? I'm glad you asked.

• This conversation, in my mind: "Oh my god, you're so good looking!"

• I decided to buy The Hunger Games book before seeing the movie and it was so good that I read all 374 pages in one sitting. Being labeled a "young adult novel" obscures the fact that it's darker and has more violence than 99 percent of "adult novels."

• On a related note: People, still the worst.

• Sarah Hyland seems like fun.

• For anyone interested in advertising on AG.com and supporting the site's free content, click here for the details of my new "sponsor of the week" program.

• Stephon Marbury is a huge Sinead O'Connor fan, obviously.

• This week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode unwittingly started an odd Twitter feud between two groups of people, so you'll probably want to hear it.

• Never forget, Geraldo Rivera boxed Frank Stallone on Howard Stern's show in 1992:

Rivera got pummeled, which might explain a lot these days.

• Michael K. Williams as Ol' Dirty Bastard? Oh, indeed.

• Minnesota native, former Gophers star, and JCC basketball legend Jack Hannahan is the Indians' new starting third baseman.

• Joba Chamberlain's gruesome injury made me think back to fifth grade when a classmate got a trampoline and I went to her house about 15 times in a month ... and then never again. Fifth grade was weird, but at least my ankle stayed inside my skin.

• Marion Barber was a rookie at 22, a Pro Bowler at 24, and is finished at 28. Being an NFL running back is scary, but I'll never forget that amazing Barber-Laurence Maroney backfield.

• There's actually one profession that ages someone more rapidly than NFL running back.

• I can't believe I never thought of this for my prom.

• Joe Morgan liked Adidas before he disliked Moneyball.

• Not only did I lose 150 pounds in one year my cousin-in-law (which might not actually be a thing, but you know what I mean) has lost 110 pounds.

• Carnie Wilson, on the other hand, tried to cheat the system and failed. So she did it again.

• Hall of Fame soul singer Bobby Womack has been diagnosed with colon cancer.

• Which one word best describes how Tim Tebow feels about being traded to the Jets?

Tebow and The Pointer Sisters have something in common.

• I was sad to see him go, but congrats to my longtime Rotoworld teammate Gregg Rosenthal for his new gig at NFL.com. Great writer, great guy, and hugely responsible for my career.

• As part of replacing Rosenthal one of my favorite writers from way back, Michael David Smith, is the new managing editor at ProFootballTalk.

• Royce White declared for the NBA draft, so the Gophers only missed one really good season.

• I finally saw The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. Another great David Fincher movie and, unlike most foreign remakes, an equal or perhaps even better version than the original. It also gave The Social Network opening breakup scene new meaning.

• Josie Long was an exceptionally charming guest on "Stop Podcasting Yourself."

• One of my favorite podcasters, Marc Maron, will soon have his own television show.

• I've always had a phobia of talking on the phone, which is rough because it's needed to set up therapy for the phobia and also because it's really dumb. But after hearing from people on Twitter and reading this I'm surprised to learn it's relatively common. Brains are weird.

• If you watched the season premiere of Mad Men you should read this and then read this.

• Happy birthday to my grandpa, Mel Gallop, who recently turned 89 years old and celebrated by complaining about Drew Butera over lunch with me.

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is Womack's classic "Across 110th Street":

• Much to the delight of The Wire fans, Omar Little got arrested in Baltimore last week.

• Simon Konecki may not know it yet, but someday he'll be the subject of a No. 1 album.

• Adrian Peterson didn't let career-altering knee surgery ruin his New Year's Eve celebration.

• Howard Stern used Twitter to drunk dial a bunch of his fans on New Year's Eve.

• This week's 60 Minutes had a segment about someone who ran a scam charging kids to take the ACT and SAT for them, and I'm proud to say the homepage on his computer is Rotoworld.

• Having two kids cost Jessica Alba the Official Fantasy Girl of AG.com title, but she's staging a helluva comeback.

• This week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode featured me chasing scotch with beer, pitching an idea for a podcast recording my blind dates, and ultimately concluding that "this podcast is completely off the rails." Oh, and we talked Twins too.

• I turned on the Nuggets-Kings game Wednesday to see rookie Kenneth Faried get garbage time action and this immediately happened:

And then moments later he did this too.

• Alex Rodriguez, nerd or hipster? You decide!

• Brandon Warne's lengthy chat with Twins hitting coach Joe Vavra is well worth reading.

• Aaron Rupar of City Pages raised an intriguing question in relation to the start of my age-29 season: Prime age for baseball players is typically around 26-30, but what's the prime age for bloggers? In terms of producing content I'd say prime blogging age is 20-24, but in terms of producing good content it's probably closer to 24-28. Either way, I'm over the hill.

• I'd watch a lot more soccer if all the goals were like this one.

• I never watch hockey, but I've never missed a second of HBO's great 24/7 series on the NHL.

• Old friend Carlos Silva has found a new home after making $48 million to throw 297 innings with a 5.82 ERA since leaving the Twins.

• I know I said not to get me anything for my birthday, but I'm still kind of disappointed that no one got me Lizzy Caplan. Maybe next year.

• Brad Miller hasn't played for the Timberwolves yet because of microfracture knee surgery, but he's already had a significant impact on the team.

• As you'd expect, Charles Barkley is even better when he thinks the microphones are off:

Something tells me TNT won't exactly be thrilled with Kevin Harlan either.

• Because of her divorce Zooey Deschanel's finances went public and I'm kind of surprised she doesn't have more money. Her eyes alone should be worth at least $1 million per month.

• I'm ashamed to have missed Portlandia until now, but immediately watched every episode on Netflix and the new season starts tonight on IFC. Until then, watch their take on baseball.

• Aimee Teagarden has maintained her adorability since Friday Night Lights ended.

• Latest podcast recommendation: "Throwing Shade" with Bryan Safi and Erin Gibson, whose various great podcast appearances have made her my favorite Erin/Aaron, including myself.

• I picked against the spread for every NFL game this season and my final tally was 129-119-8 overall, but only 69-69-4 on my favorite picks each week. That may not look bad, but if you bet $100 per game going 129-119-8 would equal a $190 loss with the vig. Gambling is hard, kids.

• In case you were wondering, this is what a 29-year-old adult eats for lunch on his birthday.

• Friend of AG.com Lindsay Guentzel is auditioning to be this season's MLB Fan Cave resident and could use your help to win the contest.

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is Vika Yermolyeva doing a piano cover of "Smells Like Teen Spirit" by Nirvana (and there are a bunch more where that came from):

• You'll have to wait until Monday morning for my analysis of the Twins signing Jason Marquis, but in honor of today being Festivus this week's Link-O-Rama is super-sized ...

And here's a little more about my favorite holiday:

Coincidentally, today is also the 100,000th time Seinfeld has been referenced on this blog.

• I'm only into Minka Kelly for her memorabilia collection anyway.

• "Survey finds most people go online for no particular reason" explains my entire career/life.

• If you've seen Pulp Fiction as many times as me you'll love watching it in chronological order.

• Albert Pujols made headlines, but this was by far the best moment of the winter meetings.

• I've been getting into Johnnie Walker black label lately, and that was before seeing their new advertising campaign.

• Whomever suggested White Castle should sell beer and wine is a genius. An evil genius.

• Headline of the week: "Man eats cocaine from brother's butt, dies."

• Louis CK skipped the middle man and sold his new comedy special on his website for $5. Not only was it great and easy to buy, the numbers should encourage others to follow suit and he donated $280,000 to charity.

• CK also called himself the Orlando Hernandez of stand-up comedy and was a great guest on Bill Simmons' podcast, although ESPN had trouble deciding which bad words to bleep out.

• Terry Ryan's taste in sweaters is similar to his taste in proven closers.

• As this intense video clearly shows, taekwondo is no joke:

My favorite was the spinning back kick.

• Chris Ison is a Pulitzer Prize winner and was one of my favorite teachers at the University of Minnesota, so his writing about my career path for the journalism school magazine is surreal.

• I used to dislike Bill Conlin as a columnist, but now that couldn't matter less. Yuck.

• David Brauer of MinnPost notes that Judd Zulgad and Joe Anderson quadrupled the ratings on 1500-ESPN after replacing Colin Cowherd.

• Hopefully throat surgery will at least allow Adele enough time to get into a relationship and have an angry breakup she can use for material. And if not I'll just try to break this record.

• If a judge sentenced me to 30 days of house arrest I'd laugh maniacally like Roberto DeNiro in Cape Fear and then take a nap.

• Probably the best (or least bad) thing Nickelback has ever done.

• Reminder: Official Fantasy Girl of AG.com candidate Kate Beckinsale is a 38-year-old mother.

• As an NBC employee and longtime Howard Stern fan this shouldn't make me so sad.

• Tony Levine, who used to referee my JCC basketball games, has replaced Kevin Sumlin as the University of Houston's new football coach.

• Amare Stoudemire was on Sesame Street teaching Hebrew. Obviously:

He probably would have been pretty decent in that JCC basketball league.

• Al Jefferson has a 38-year-old girlfriend and she got arrested for allegedly biting him.

• My online love affair with Chantel Kendall from Baseball Wives was fun while it lasted, but all good things must come to an end.

• Not to be outdone by Jacque Jones becoming the Padres' new Single-A hitting coach, Doug Mientkiewicz is the Dodgers' new rookie-ball hitting coach. Luis Rivas is still out of work.

• My favorite quote from Anthony Bourdain's predictably terrific appearance on Marc Maron's podcast: "I was regularly vomiting publicly and happy about it."

• Paz de la Huerta should be at the top of most lists, but this one in particular makes sense.

• Anyone wanna back me for this poker tournament?

• My childhood gets super confused looking at a 44-year-old Pamela Anderson.

• Local reporter Jon Krawcynski and the Associated Press reached a settlement with the NBA.

• On this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" podcast we discussed what the Twins' lineup looks like with Josh Willingham and Ryan Doumit replacing Michael Cuddyer and Jason Kubel, the difference between Christmas and Hanukkah, and first impressions of Ricky Rubio after seeing him in person. We also recapped one of my rare party-going experiences, as shown here:

From left to right that's me, Lindsay Guentzel, John Bonnes, and Parker Hageman.

• There's also photographic evidence of Bonnes dominating at quarters. Made a co-host proud.

• Sports Business Journal named my boss as the most influential person in sports business.

• So far so good with the Minneapolis Star Tribune's switch to a metered paywall.

• It turns out no one wants to read about actual baseball on a baseball blog.

• From now on I'll be referring to Kelly Oxford as a co-worker.

• Hey girl, how about some drunk history?

• Brandon Roy's too-short basketball career got the eulogy it deserved from Jason Quick.

• Melanie Laurent in Beginners might be the most attractive person ever. Good movie, too.

• On a related note, I carry around this list in my pocket, just in case.

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video--as quoted in Monday's post--is "Yesterday Was Hard On All Of Us" by Fink:

• It's no surprise that "the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be" also has the best family photo of all time.

• At a gymnastics meet Saturday a 60-year-old St. Thomas math professor punched a person wearing the Goldy Gopher mascot outfit and I'm having a hard time choosing who to side with in the story. Incidentally, my cousin once punched Mickey Mouse in the face while eating dinner at Epcot Center and 20 years later I still consider the moment one of the highlights of my life.

• Jack Dickey recapping the Sloan Sports Analytics Conference is a must-read, if only for the analogy comparing Malcolm Gladwell to Delmon Young.

• Doesn't she know that dropouts never amount to anything?

• Felicia Pearson, who played Snoop on The Wire, is among 63 people arrested in a Baltimore drug raid. David Simon chimed in regarding the incident, which probably doesn't qualify as "life imitating art" considering that Pearson's character on the show already imitated her actual life. "How my hair look, Mike?"

• Tim McCarver will be calling games on FOX through at least 2013. I'm going to need a new mute button by then.

• Ozzie Guillen quote of the week: "I'm the Charlie Sheen of baseball, but without drugs and a prostitute."

• For someone who grew up playing video games and marveling at the Chicago Bulls this video is just about perfect:

Whoever put that together and spliced in the old audio clips is a genius. Seriously.

• J.C. Romero drove his Porsche Panamera from his offseason home in Alabama to the Phillies' spring training complex in Florida. And then someone stole it.

• I'm proud to say that three different people e-mailed me this link, which is a testament to my consistent perviness and the AG.com readers' continued support of said perviness.

• Some people may see an awful lot of tattoos, but I see an awful lot of teeth.

• I'm seeking recommendations for the best baseball writers who extensively cover prospects across MLB, rather than a team-specific focus, and also aren't affiliated with a prominent site already. Feel free to leave your suggestions in the comments section or e-mail them to me.

• Everyone has been spelling Kendry Morales' name wrong since 2004.

• Kelly Oxford is one of my favorite non-baseball people to follow on Twitter and now she has television and book deals based on her great tweets.

• In case you missed this public service announcement earlier in the week: LaVelle E. Neal III would like everyone to stop confusing him with Al Newman.

• This is obviously very sad, but how long should I wait to inquire about the job opening?

• Mike Pelfrey learned the hard way that you never assume a woman is pregnant.

• As part of the Minneapolis Jewish Film Festival there's a screening of "Jews and Baseball: An American Love Story" on March 30 at the Mall of America. Here's a trailer for the film:

Howard Sinker of the Minneapolis Star Tribune is introducing the film at MoA, Dustin Hoffman is the movie's narrator, and there are interviews with everyone from Sandy Koufax and Kevin Youkilis to Ron Howard and Larry King. Recommended for members of the tribe and goyim.

• Last week Howard Stern, who lives in New York, appeared on Jimmy Kimmel Live, which is in Los Angeles. And instead of the usual satellite setup, they green-screened him into the chair.

• On a related note, Jimmy Kimmel's ex-girlfriend, Sarah Silverman, had a great appearance on Stern's show yesterday.

• Andy Dick's appearance on Joe Rogan's podcast was pretty great too.

• My uncle and cousin are both available for scouting jobs.

• Rotoworld's annual fantasy baseball draft guide is now available online. I'm "editor-in-chief" and it's a big part of my job, so I'd be grateful if AG.com readers checked it out. You get 1,000 player profiles and projections, a couple dozen strategy articles, customizable cheat sheets, and a whole bunch of other good stuff that adds up to 150,000-plus words of content updated all spring. Buy it, so I don't have to move back to the proverbial parents' basement.

• I'm still loving Netlix streaming. Some recent documentary recommendations: The September Issue, The Parking Lot Movie, Eternal Enemies: Lions and Hyenas, The Wild and Wonderful Whites, Gonzo, Rolling Stones: Stones in Exile.

• Here are some highlights from my NBCSports.com blogging this week:

- Chase Utley's status for Opening Day in doubt due to on knee injury
- Someone should tell Nyjer Morgan to stop trying to steal bases
- Coco Crisp was being followed by "secret service" at time of DUI arrest
- Domonic Brown set for surgery tomorrow; out 4-6 weeks
- Jake Peavy throwing well and aiming "to break camp with the team"
- Charlie Manuel close to two-year extension with Phillies
- Adam Dunn should visit Baseball-Reference.com some time
- Ryan Madson hopes to stay with the Phillies, but wants to be a closer
- For some reason the Royals want Billy Butler stealing bases

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is Mark Schottinger performing "Black and White" from the aforementioned The Parking Lot Movie: