November 21, 2014

Link-O-Rama

Nora Purmort and Aaron Purmort are sort of the official couple of Twin Cities Twitter. They are beloved, both online and in person, and their young son Ralphie Purmort is an Instagram superstar because he's basically the cutest kid of all time. Aaron was diagnosed with a brain tumor shortly after they got married and Nora has been writing honestly, openly, and humorously about their life together in a way that is truly inspiring.

Now they need your help. Aaron's condition has worsened to the point that treatment has stopped working and he's entered into hospice care at home. He's dying. At the urging of her sister Nora has set up an online fundraiser via which people can donate money to help a great family in need. So go read the archives of Nora's blog, My Husband's Tumor, which is well-written and sad and touching and funny. And then go donate whatever you can to help them. Please.

• Friend of AG.com Maggie LaMaack interviewed Aaron Purmort, who said: "I think I am the first person on LOL/OMG to be interviewed on his death bed."

• Great headline, with an even better mugshot: "Drunken bicyclist arrested at Taco Bell drive-through after tussle with cops."

• For just $60 (and a flight to Oregon) you can get an hour-long cuddling session that includes "hair strokes, hand-holding, and a plethora of different cuddle positions."

• "The Voice" contacted Jason Isbell about auditioning for their show, which is like if a Triple-A team contacted Mike Trout to see if he wanted to try out as a shortstop.

Helluva legal system when admitting to regularly ejaculating into a co-worker's coffee doesn't result in a clear, immediate means for punishment.

• On this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode we examined the Twins' options for finding an outfielder in free agency and reviewed Fritos Chili pizza.

• On a related note, this is either performance art of the person who cut it is insane.

• Wisconsin running back Melvin Gordon set the college record with 408 rushing yards and did so in just three quarters against Nebraska, but more importantly he got a Tecmo Bowl reenactment:

I miss Tecmo Bowl in my life.

• As a new "Scandal" watcher I hope they cast Rihanna in a guest role and she dates Joshua Malina's character.

• There are seven arbitration-eligible players on the Twins' roster and December 2 is the deadline to tender them contracts for 2015, so I tried to figure out what they should do with each one.

• Baseball America released its annual list of the Twins' top 10 prospects, with the same top five as last year in a slightly different order.

• An example of why Parker Hageman of Twins Daily is so good: He breaks down potential Twins target Justin Masterson using stats, scouting, quotes, and video.

Mike Wise is the latest old white dude to make me sad about eventually becoming one myself.

Marilyn Manson is doing a concert at Mystic Lake casino in February. Imagine that crowd.

Chelsea Peretti's new stand-up special "One of the Greats" is on Netflix and it's predictably fantastic, with lots of funny/weird Easter Egg-type stuff thrown in.

• One of my favorite comedians, John Mulaney, was a good guest on "WTF" with Marc Maron.

• Restaurant recommendation: Black Sheep Pizza in North Loop lived up to the considerable hype.

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Highland Park robbery video"
- "Baseball movie with Gilbert Gottfried"
- "Eddie Guardado speaks Spanish"
- "Snoop Dogg jet"
- "Drew Butera girlfriend"
- "Chelsea Peretti dating Denzel Washington"
- "Torii Hunter not such a great guy"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is Isbell doing a live version of "Cover Me Up" on November 18:


This week's blog content is sponsored by Uber, which is offering a free ride to first-time users who sign up with the promo code "UberGleeman."

April 11, 2014

Link-O-Rama

Delmon Young hitting a 50-hop ground ball past a diving Derek Jeter is what the 2014 baseball season is all about

Bartolo Colon jiggling his gut is my spirit animal.

• If you've ever wanted a customized nickname from Ron Gardenhire, this is your lucky day.

• Someone please hire Randball's Stu to write for a living. He suddenly needs a job and is Minnesota's funniest writer.

• The lesson here is to not trust anyone who doesn't like Kendrick Lamar.

• My analysis of the Twins trading for Eduardo Nunez was mostly underwhelming.

• I love how seriously Jay Boller took his analysis of the Twins' walk-up songs.

• Dang. The Ultimate Warrior died.

• I've been using Uber a lot lately and it's amazingly easy/pleasant compared to cabs. If you use this promo code you get $20 off a ride and I get $20 too, which allows me to drink Jack Daniels all across this great state of ours. Give it a shot. Why not?

This week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode kicked off our third season on KFAN, with a new producer and the usual live radio show plus podcast portion.

• I've been getting really into "Workaholics" lately and Waymond is my favorite character:

Great acting is all about subtle nuance.

• I'm planning to make this an ongoing project with expanded reviews, pictures, and lots of other stuff, so for now this is just a very preliminary version of my Uptown Bar Power Rankings.

• Speaking of which, I'm very sad to see Rye Deli suddenly close up shop. It was home to many of my mediocre first dates and even hosted "Gleeman and The Geek" on multiple occasions. RIP.

• We've talked about it so much that Parker Hageman of Twins Daily is now trying to convince me to buy this bar.

• On a related note, Hageman wrote an interesting article about Chris Colabello that's definitely worth checking out.

• Braves shortstop Andrelton Simmons is absolutely ridiculous.

• As a Jack Daniels devotee I enjoyed Kara Nesvig's tribute to whiskey-based romancing.

• This week I went to the Kmart on Lake Street for the first time and it was one of the saddest experiences of my entire life, so I'm not sure how I feel about this development.

Paul Goldschmidt owns Tim Lincecum.

• America's best, most important television couple.

• I'm pretty sick of Maggie LaMaack at this point, but she interviewed yet another tweeter I very much enjoy following in Talia Wischmann.

• Royals rookie Yordano Ventura threw a 103-mph pitch.

• If you're wondering whether Hank Aaron is the "True Home Run King" read this.

• Based on Molly Fitzpatrick's article about dating labels, I'd like to someday be known by: 1) "My plus-one." 2) "My arm candy." 3) "The Bae."

Taco Cat delivery service is the type of thing that makes me proud to have moved to Uptown.

• Friend of AG.com and former "Gleeman and The Geek" guest Jack Moore has a Kickstarter-driven project at the Beacon Reader, which is the type of thing baseball fans should support.

Jason Isbell chatting with Marc Maron was basically my idea of podcasting perfection. And they even recorded the episode in Minnesota.

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Hairy twins"
- "Ricky Rubio tattoo"
- "Can I eat baked chicken wings after late-night workout?"
- "Did Brock Lesnar play for the Minnesota Twins?"
- "Greg Gagne net worth"
- "Minnesota Twins players with beards"
- "Can you break your ear cartilage?"
- "Kevin Slowey shirtless"
- "I'm a teen and I want to work at Pizza Hut"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is "So Special" by Lil Wayne and John Legend:


Advertise your product, service, business, or website to thousands of people each day and support the free content on AG.com by becoming a Sponsor of the Week.

February 21, 2014

Link-O-Rama

• Back in my day babies played much better man-to-man defense.

• If you want to sell a shitload of girl scout cookies just set up a table in front of a pot dispensary.

• I took notes while reading Molly Fitzpatrick's guide to making out in bars.

• Oh nothing, just someone eating four Chipotle burritos in three minutes without exploding.

• At some point very soon I'm going to be the last single person not on Tinder.

• Multiple studies show that Minnesota men are really bad at sex.

• On this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode John Bonnes scolded me for not kissing girls quickly enough, we sang the praises of Rye Deli, and celebrated pitchers and catchers reporting.

Pitbull and Kesha isn't really a combination that interests me, but a doo-wop cover of Pitbull and Kesha is right up my alley:

(Note: I refuse to use a dollar sign for Mase's name, so I'm damn sure not using it for Kesha.)

CC Sabathia is legitimately skinny now, which means he also probably misses Chinese food.

Maggie LaMaack's media blitz continues with another City Pages cover story, this one about 50 things to do in the Twin Cities before you die. I've done 12 of them and will likely die very soon.

• LaMaack also took time out of her cover story-writing schedule to interview one of my top 30 local tweeters, the ever-hilarious Ampersandria.

• At least we'll be able to continue doing the podcast even if one of us gets arrested.

Mike Redmond took a big step in his second year as manager, allowing the Marlins to grow beards after Ricky Nolasco broke all the rules last season.

The Onion: "Tips for pulling an all-nighter."

• Bodies are the worst. Mark Mulder was making a comeback after not pitching since 2008 ... and ruptured his Achilles' tendon on Day 1.

• During his amazing show at First Avenue last week Jason Isbell told us about an incident in the audience the previous night and, the internet being the internet, someone caught it on video:

Wisconsin, man.

• This interview is decent, but the larger point is that there's a human being who looks like this.

• My first ever experience working from a coffee shop was captured by intrepid photojournalist and internet creeper Megan Weisenberger.

• I'm definitely not the type of person who feels at home working from a coffee shop, for several different reasons, but Spyhouse Coffee in Uptown was a perfectly lovely venue.

• Old friend Matt Capps is having shoulder problems for the second straight season.

• Brunch spot recommendation: Meritage in St. Paul. Expensive, but well worth it.

• I used Local Motion to move me from Minnetonka to Uptown and couldn't have been happier with the whole experience. Professional, friendly, and efficient.

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Parker Hageman second chance"
- "Kat Dennings porn lookalike"
- "Robin Wright porn lookalike"
- "Chelsea Peretti porn lookalike"
- "1982 Minnesota Twins roster"
- "Elisha Cuthbert podcast"
- "Aaron Gleeman top tweeters"
- "Who is John Sharkman?"
- "No cake, no pizza, no Chinese food"
- "How much does a Twins player get paid?"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is "Can't Tell Me Nothing" by Kanye West:

February 14, 2014

Link-O-Rama

• I loved Jason Isbell's concert at First Avenue last weekend and Chris Riemenschneider of the Minneapolis Star Tribune did a great job capturing the overall vibe in his review.

• My jobs have forced me to be involved in hundreds of mock drafts over the years, so the idea of someone intentionally ruining them is absolutely hilarious to me.

Headline of the week: "Minnesota woman accused of stealing camo lingerie from Fleet Farm."

Paul "Meatsauce" Lambert from KFAN and Falen Bonsett from KDWB told the story/stories of how they fell in love and it's basically the sweetest thing ever.

• As a child of divorce I'm not capable of handling my two favorites, Ma$e and J. Cole, beefing.

• On this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode we broke down all of the Twins' spring training position battles, including Miguel Sano, and then John Bonnes mocked me for a bunch of stuff.

• I didn't win the Vita.mn "crush contest" and neither did my personal crush Ampersandria, but Jana Shortal is a worthy champion for whom I was proud to buy Rumple Minze shots.

• This was the official write-up/photo they chose for my candidacy:

crush contest

Tough to figure out why I didn't win, obviously.

• My mom finally met Paul Allen and now she has a crush on him.

• Athletes in the Olympic Village are using Tinder, which sounds like the premise of a porn movie.

• I do a similar thing to Kate Hansen's routine to prepare for blogging each morning.

• If you've ever wondered what it would sound like if I hastily left a bar around 11:00 p.m. to be interviewed about the Twins on Baseball Prospectus' podcast, this is your lucky day!

• I also joined the degenerates on "The Sportive" for a profanity-filled podcast about silliness.

Jay Z and Beyonce win the synchronized shade-throwing gold medal.

• Speaking of which: Surfbort.

• I'd probably need to be married for a decade before sharing my Netflix password with someone.

• I guess Kate Mara is decent looking if you're into that type of thing.

The Onion: "Coworkers Currently Gchatting About You."

• Superheroes have never done much for me and I've always wondered how so many guys got so obsessed with them. This video might answer that question:

As a little kid I had that same reaction the first time I saw Jarvis Brown pinch-run for the Twins.

• Reds closer Aroldis Chapman seems like a lot of fun:

Finally, a few minutes before 4 p.m., the curtains lift and Chapman descends the spiral staircase to the pool deck. He wears sandals, sunglasses and a tank top obscured by heavy gold chains. He lights a Marlboro Red cigarette and flops down onto an all-weather mattress near the pool.

"Why so late like this?" Maria Caridad asks. "Why all this sleeping?"

"There's nothing else to do," he says.

I'm another 40 miles per hour on my fastball away from being Chapman, basically.

• On a related note, we'll be joining forces to fight against this ridiculousness.

• Remember that incredibly embarrassing video of Twins Daily blogger Parker Hageman of a TLC reality show from 10 years ago? Well, he tried to explain himself (and his robe).

• Here's a glimpse into what it looks like when I'm straight up balling at Stella's.

• Netflix recommendation: "Strongman" is one of the most brutally honest, sweet, and ultimately depressing documentaries I've ever seen.

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "TLC Second Chance"
- "Best soccer cover for tweeter"
- "Maria Bello porn lookalike"
- "Tila Tequila high school"
- "Bearded Minnesota Twins"
- "Aaron Gl"
- "Aaaron Gleeman"
- "Aaron Gleman"
- "Aaron Gleamon"
- "Aaron Gleemam"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is "Cover Me Up" by Isbell:

January 17, 2014

Link-O-Rama

• Link-O-Rama favorite Dayn Perry went in search of Paul Molitor at his most handsome and what he found changed his life forever.

• I may never forgive myself for missing Sid Hartman's estate sale.

• I saw "Inside Llewyn Davis" and liked it enough to re-rank my favorite Coen Brothers movies.

• On a related note: Twitter is amazing and I'm horrible.

• In addition to being a great stand-up comedian Kyle Kinane spits truth about beards.

• I took a "what city should you actually live in?" quiz on Buzzfeed and got London, but honestly that's probably a little too far from Stella's.

• I was a "Baseball Stars" kid, but this is still fun news for anyone who grew up in the 1990s.

Jerry Seinfeld, Larry David, and Jason Alexander got the band back together.

• On this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode we talked about the Twins' spring training invite list, planned my upcoming move to New Zealand, and witnessed a first date in progress.

• It turns out that Robert Downey Jr. can really sing:

(Or at least can really sing kind of like Sting.)

Chris Brown of Grantland wrote a really good, in-depth article about how Pete Carroll and the Seahawks built the best defense in football.

• It's obvious from his eyes that the Cubs' new mascot has seen a lot of pain.

• I would watch CNN more if this was a regular thing for Randi Kaye.

Eric Decker has really come a long way since his days at the University of Minnesota.

• There's a new "concept store" opening in Hopkins "seeking individuals with existing knowledge of craft beer and/or whiskey." I'm happy to have a fallback plan in case NBCSports.com fires me.

• One of the most rewarding aspects of writing a super-personal birthday post about my life was hearing from people who've struggled with similar issues, including this well-written version.

• Who wore it better: Yours Truly or Bill Murray?

• Yeah, but still.

• As an egg-thrower from way back, Justin Bieber's current situation amuses me.

• Old friend Delmon Young signed a minor-league deal with Baltimore, where he could replace old friend Danny Valencia as the Orioles' platoon designated hitter versus left-handers.

• How did Possum Plows follow up her life-changing video from last week?

I like it. You know, for a song that isn't dedicated to me.

• I was pleased to see Bruce Springsteen give a nice shoutout to Jason Isbell.

Jeff Dubay was fired by 1500-ESPN in what the station called a cost-cutting move.

• Sisyphus Brewing is opening a taproom that features comedy and podcasting. Not a bad idea.

• Your weekly reminder that Aubrey Plaza is perfect.

• I really enjoyed the first episode of "True Detective" on HBO and you know there's some serious acting involved when these two can convincingly play police detectives.

• One of my favorite comedians, Morgan Murphy, has a new stand-up special on Netflix.

• Congrats to friend of AG.com Jon Marthaler for getting engaged to a lovely woman with iffy standards. I believe this means he owes $100,000 to John Bonnes now. Is that how it works?

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Clarence Clemons wanted to date Robin Quivers"
- "Nigella Lawson lookalike porn."
- "Son loses 150 pounds without telling family"
- "Lost weight using Lean Cuisines"
- "Chelsea players carrying brooms"
- "Drew Butera girlfriend"
- "Kate Mara with Boston Terriers"
- "Are the Coen brothers Jewish?"
- "Who has a crush on Aaron Gleeman?"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is Cory Chisel and Adriel Danae singing a live cover version of "Rosie" by Tom Waits:

Older Posts »