AaronGleeman.com

• Sunday starting at 3:00 p.m. John Bonnes and I will be doing a two-hour version of Gleeman and The Geek live from the KFAN booth at the Minnesota state fair. I learned yesterday morning how much fun it is to do live radio in front of an actual audience and I'd love to see a bunch of AG.com readers and Gleeman and The Geek listeners there. We'll take questions from the crowd and you can watch us argue in person, so come hang out and say hello.

• On a related note, yesterday's "Girls Gone Gleeman" bit at the state fair went a lot better than I expected, which is to say it wasn't a total disaster. There was a big crowd at the KFAN booth, Paul Allen was a great ringleader, Joe Nelson worked his magic behind the scenes, and the women were way too nice, way too normal, and way too pretty to be involved in something so silly. And based on the reaction I've gotten, it made for some interesting radio.

This was my view from the KFAN booth (that's me in the middle):

You can listen to my initial hour-long appearance and the whole dating game part of the show by clicking here. And then later, after going on a hour-plus quasi-date (and eating fried pickles) with one of the women, we returned to the KFAN booth and recapped everything with PA and Marney Gellner from FSN, which you can listen to by clicking here. And yes, underneath the hoodie I was wearing my tuxedo t-shirt.

• Miguel Sano is trying to steal my tuxedo t-shirt look.

• Just when I was getting sick of constantly hearing my own Bane impression, this exists.

• Everyone always says this, but I really mean it: They're perfect for each other.

• Thomas Golianopoulos at Grantland put together an oral history of one of my favorite movies, White Men Can't Jump. Among the many interesting tidbits revealed: Sidney Deane and Billy Hoyle were almost played by Denzel Washington and Keanu Reeves.

• It takes an incredible amount of effort to ruin a picture of Official Fantasy Girl of AG.com Mila Kunis at a baseball game in a Dodgers jersey.

• Jeff Kent is going to be on the new season of Survivor, presumably with his mustache and without Barry Bonds.

• If you're a stand-up comedy fan and don't already know the greatness of Joan Rivers, listen to her be an amazing guest on Nerdist with Chris Hardwick. At age 79!

• Melky Cabrera was a big investor in Jukt Micronics.

• This starts off with a story about throwing up in public and then pretty much goes downhill from there.

• As someone who liked the book and mostly disliked the movie, Screen Junkies' "honest trailer" for The Hunger Games hit the spot:

And it made $700 million, so what the hell do I know.

• Nick Blackburn, worst pitcher in baseball.

• I couldn't even bring myself to mention this on last week's show. So much shame.

• Never underestimate the power of Seinfeld, even decades later.

• On a related note, YouTube has a full version of Jerry Seinfeld's documentary Comedian and it's just as good as I remember from watching it the first time in 2002.

• After nine seasons The Office is coming to an end. It was never as good as the British version and declined in recent years, but the show was pretty damn funny for a long time. And served as the launching pad for Jenna Fischer's ongoing Official Fantasy Girl of AG.com candidacy.

• Most of these responses were dumb and/or ignorant, but Death Cab For Cutie frontman (and Zooey Deschanel ex-husband) Ben Gibbard made stat-heads proud.

• Showtime canceled the Marlins despite their new ballpark, offseason spending, and Ozzie Guillen's best efforts to make a last-place team interesting.

• This comment is so amazing that I'm half-convinced it's parody. AG.com commenters aren't so bad after all!

• Two great tastes that taste great together: Julie Klausner podcasts it up with Marc Maron.

• How adorable: My blog-mates Craig Calcaterra and D.J. Short met in person for the first time and wore matching outfits.

• Not exactly the lightest read in terms of subject matter or style, but The Hot House: Life Inside Leavenworth Prison by Pete Earley is one of the best non-fiction books I've ever read.

• Jay Boller at the Minneapolis Star Tribune's sister website Vita.mn wrote a nice little article about this blog's 10th anniversary, although because I didn't have time for a new photo shoot they used an on-file picture of me from 100 pounds, six years, and three laptops ago.

• Back by popular demand, this week's most amusing, weird, and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Is Glen Perkins a viable setup man?"
- "Tsuyoshi Nishioka KFAN porn"
- "Gordon Ramsay baseball"
- "Elisha Cuthbert baseball"
- "Jimmy Pardo fantasy baseball"
- "Why did Francisco Liriano get traded?"
- "Delmon Young ugly mustache"
- "Who is Lew Ford's girlfriend?"
- "Eric Chavez handsome"
- "Why can't you use big gloves for infield?"
- "A.J. Pierzynski boxers or briefs?
- "Minnesota Twins why they stink"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is "Happy Song" by Otis Redding:

Interested in sponsoring a week of AG.com? Click here for details.

• Eric Chavez throwing the ball back to an unsuspecting Cody Eppley is GIF magic.

• Nicolas Batum's nut-punching above replacement level is off the charts, which is no doubt why the Timberwolves made such a strong run at him this offseason.

• See, now they're just taunting me. Might be time to evaluate some other candidates.

• In honor of Usain Bolt's latest gold medal the New York Times created a fascinating video showing the evolution of the 100-meter dash at the Olympics. Humans are pretty amazing.

• I'm pretty sure Google has been listening to Gleeman and The Geek and is now inventing things specifically for me.

• Sid Hartman's recent Minneapolis Star Tribune column includes a note saying that "it's unlikely 1500-AM will carry Twins broadcasts beyond this season."

• For anyone interested in local radio ratings, my MinnPost colleague David Brauer has the latest numbers and analysis. Short version: KFAN continues to dominate.

• Update on my all-Chinese food diet: I ate hunan chicken from Yangtze almost literally every day for an entire month and gained 10 pounds. I'm not sure what was accomplished, other than learning I'm still capable of being a fastso, but now I'm back on the low-calorie wagon.

• Behold, the worst play of the season:

On a related note, for as awful as the Twins have been since the beginning of 2011 they've got 20 more wins than the Astros during that time. Seriously: 112-162 compared to 92-182.

• Ricky Gervais is the latest comedian to ride in Jerry Seinfeld's car and go for coffee.

• Amelia Rayno of the Minneapolis Star Tribune wrote an excellent article about Corey Koskie's life after a concussion ruined his baseball career.

• Tim Allen, who blogged excellently and creatively about the Timberwolves at Canis Hoopis since 2009, committed suicide at age 29.

• Turner Broadcasting bought Bleacher Report for $175 million.

• Frank Viola's daughter, Brittany Viola, finished 15th in the Olympic diving semi-finals.

• Carson Cistulli put together some good advice for how to become an internet baseball writer, although he oddly left out "be incredibly handsome."

• As always my favorite podcast guest, Chelsea Peretti, was great on Doug Loves Movies with Doug Benson, Sarah Silverman and Anthony Jeselnik. And my friend and former Rotoworld colleague Gregg Rosenthal was actually in the audience.

• Speaking of Peretti, she makes a cameo appearance in this amusing compilation video of all the times Louis C.K. has said "I'm sorry" on Louie:

Also: Joan Rivers.

• Freakonomics Radio explains why getting a college degree isn't always so valuable.

• On the other hand, things are looking up for journalism school graduates these days.

• Old school Orioles catcher Gus Triandos had a very memorable place in The Wire world, but the show had plenty of other sports-related story lines too.

• It turns out the Minneapolis Star Tribune headline about "weed dating" was a false alarm.

• Tuesday morning I was getting tweets saying stuff like "do you really wear tuxedo t-shirts?" and "what's with a polka dot fanny pack?" and "uh, you may want to turn on KFAN." I listened to the podcast later and heard Paul Allen and Marney Gellner discuss "Girls Gone Gleeman" without me even being present, including Gellner replying "I follow him on Twitter and his mom is a sweetheart" when asked if she knew me. Which, really, should be on my tombstone.

• I was in-studio to defend my honor yesterday and PA threw a curveball by actually wanting to talk Twins for a while. We eventually got to the "Girls Gone Gleeman" situation, which now includes at least one legitimate applicant. And if you listen to the podcast you can hear PA's reaction when I strip down to reveal an actual tuxedo t-shirt that was shipped overnight via Amazon.com just for the occasion. In other words, things are getting very serious.

• And because KFAN clearly hadn't devoted enough airtime to my love life this week, two hours later PA cold-called me at home live on the air to deliver some breaking "Girls Gone Gleeman" news. FSN sideline reporter Robby Incmikoski was in-studio at the time, so we became pals again and at some point I agreed to let him serve as a special guest judge for the dating game-style show we're planning at the state fair. He seems excited about it, at least.

• I've been on Twitter for three years and this is by far my most successful use of the medium:

It turns out running your fingers through my hair can be very addicting.

• On a related note, looks like we'll be doing a live Gleeman and The Geek show from the KFAN booth at the state fair on August 26. My guess is we'll take lots of audience questions, so if you've ever wanted to see John Bonnes arguing with me in person this is your big chance.

• Your weekly reminder that Vin Scully is the best.

• Jon Weisman is right: This picture made me smile.

• For some reason my rush-delivered tuxedo t-shirt did not come with any huge guns.

• What music would you listen to if you'd been deaf for your entire life and could finally hear?

• In which I sing a Beyonce song to Danny Valencia.

• If you look up "hero" in the dictionary ... well, you'll see a definition. Also, this Julie Klausner story is pretty great.

• If you're into basketball, sports betting, poker, or (like me) all of the above Jay Caspian Kang's podcast interview with longtime AG.com favorite Haralabos Voulgaris is a must-listen.

• Back by popular demand, this week's most amusing, weird, and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Bert Blyleven fart"
- "Boof Bonser salary"
- "Brian Dinkelman salary"
- "J.J. Hardy wife"
- "Can a catcher also play outfield"
- "Ben Revere throwing arm"
- "Michelle Beadle twinkie"
- "Chelsea Peretti drugs"
- "Parker Posey weight"
- "Dirty slide slow pitch softball"
- "Joe Thurston ex-girlfriend"
- "Tsuyoshi Nishioka error"
- "Christopher Nolan baseball"
- "Fat man stuffing his face"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is the album version of "Where We Gonna Go From Here" by Mat Kearney:

This week's blog content is sponsored by DiamondCentric's new "Walks Will Haunt" t-shirt, which looks good on any Twins fan. Please support them for supporting AG.com.

• I'm pretty convinced that it will rank somewhere between incredibly embarrassing and utterly humiliating, but at Paul Allen's urging and in the name of good radio "Girls Gone Gleeman" is a dating game-style show that's going to happen on KFAN live from the state fair next month. I'll pass along full details later, but in the meantime you can listen to us brainstorming on the air yesterday (mixed in with a bunch of Twins talk during an hour-long segment).

• Based on this St. Paul Pioneer Press headline for Ben Goessling's article, the Twins now have the same problem that's plagued bloggers.

• Join the club, Demi.

• Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David more or less shooting the shit for a day is basically perfect.

• Delmon Young has a gorgeous new mustache, which more than makes up for his .700 OPS.

• Zubaz, white limousines, pitching machines, and Minnesota fashion icons of the 1980s.

• I've given up trying to explain Jason Marquis since the Twins released him.

• Behold, the most Carlos Gomez thing in the history of Carlos Gomez things.

And of course the at-bat ends the only way the at-bat could possibly end.

• I give Michael Phelps credit for not being afraid to further his stoner reputation.

• Kevin Love apparently stays awake on flights to document his Olympic teammates sleeping.

• I'm thinking about trying to put $100,000 together just to hang out with Hakeem Olajuwon.

• Gordon Ramsay making $38 million per year may seem like a lot, but that breaks down to less than 50 dollars per television show.

• On a related note, as a loyal Twitter follower seeing Chelsea Peretti make a brief cameo as an unhappy diner on Hell's Kitchen cracked me up.

• Cal Ripken Jr.'s mother was abducted at gunpoint and Orioles manager Buck Showalter shared a similarly scary story about his mother.

• Warning: Don't use the bathroom around Michael Morse.

• Pirates prospect Starling Marte debuted last night and homered on the first pitch he saw.

• I like to watch Ted Berg make sandwiches.

• As a kid I often wrote stuff on my mom's old typewriter for absolutely no reason other than it seemed fun, but as an adult I'm not quite pretentious enough to install this on my laptop.

• Here's a Google Chat transcript of what happened when my mom asked me why Twitter wasn't working yesterday afternoon:

I waited another half-hour to fess up, and only because Twitter finally started working again.

• Interesting news in the online sportswriting world, as former Fanhouse founding editor and Yahoo! director of blogs Jamie Mottram has a new job with USA Today Sports Media Group.

• An original baseball blogger, Jon Weisman, celebrated 10 years of Dodger Thoughts.

• Now that Alex Rodriguez is old and injured, what are his chances of breaking Barry Bonds' all-time homer record? I'm glad you asked.

• It turns out the mask makes everyone as scary as Bane.

• The Trade Deadline Rises.

• Movie recommendation: The Prestige, which is the film Christopher Nolan directed in between Batman Begins and The Dark Knight. It somehow flew under my radar until now, but has a few of the usual Nolan favorites in an interesting story and is well worth a $1.99 rental on Amazon.

• Speaking of the usual Nolan favorites, this made me laugh.

• Thanks to Barnabas Piper for naming Gleeman and The Geek as one of his favorite podcasts.

• According to this completely scientific poll, AG.com is the second-best "sports blog" and I'm the ninth-best "sports talk radio personality."

• Every day hundreds of people arrive at AG.com via search engine queries and most of them are Googling stuff like "Gleeman" or "Twins blog." I'm also amused by the weird and seemingly random searches that lead people here, so here are some of my favorites from this week:

- "Chuck Knoblauch fat"
- "Dick Bremer hates Kevin Slowey"
- "B.J. Hermsen salary"
- "Rene Tosoni salary"
- "Dana Wessel hair"
- "Kate Bilo age"
- "Evan Longoria dating Kate Upton"
- "Why does Matt Capps suck so badly"
- "Is eating a pound of carrots really zero points"
- "How many children does Brett Myers have"
- "Sasha Gray blog"
- "Patrick Reusse diet"
- "Jay-Z is not left-handed"
- "Kathy Kepler ballet"
- "Is a .199 batting average good"
- "Jenna Fischer covered post-it notes"

And then there were like 500 variations of "how to lose 150 pounds."

• Finally, in honor of Paul Allen describing me to potential dating game applicants as having "a George Michael beard" this week's AG.com-approved music video is "Faith":

This week's blog content is sponsored by Ballplayer: Pelotero, a controversial new documentary about baseball prospects in the Dominican Republic starring Miguel Sano as a 16-year-old.