November 21, 2014

Link-O-Rama

Nora Purmort and Aaron Purmort are sort of the official couple of Twin Cities Twitter. They are beloved, both online and in person, and their young son Ralphie Purmort is an Instagram superstar because he's basically the cutest kid of all time. Aaron was diagnosed with a brain tumor shortly after they got married and Nora has been writing honestly, openly, and humorously about their life together in a way that is truly inspiring.

Now they need your help. Aaron's condition has worsened to the point that treatment has stopped working and he's entered into hospice care at home. He's dying. At the urging of her sister Nora has set up an online fundraiser via which people can donate money to help a great family in need. So go read the archives of Nora's blog, My Husband's Tumor, which is well-written and sad and touching and funny. And then go donate whatever you can to help them. Please.

• Friend of AG.com Maggie LaMaack interviewed Aaron Purmort, who said: "I think I am the first person on LOL/OMG to be interviewed on his death bed."

• Great headline, with an even better mugshot: "Drunken bicyclist arrested at Taco Bell drive-through after tussle with cops."

• For just $60 (and a flight to Oregon) you can get an hour-long cuddling session that includes "hair strokes, hand-holding, and a plethora of different cuddle positions."

• "The Voice" contacted Jason Isbell about auditioning for their show, which is like if a Triple-A team contacted Mike Trout to see if he wanted to try out as a shortstop.

Helluva legal system when admitting to regularly ejaculating into a co-worker's coffee doesn't result in a clear, immediate means for punishment.

• On this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode we examined the Twins' options for finding an outfielder in free agency and reviewed Fritos Chili pizza.

• On a related note, this is either performance art of the person who cut it is insane.

• Wisconsin running back Melvin Gordon set the college record with 408 rushing yards and did so in just three quarters against Nebraska, but more importantly he got a Tecmo Bowl reenactment:

I miss Tecmo Bowl in my life.

• As a new "Scandal" watcher I hope they cast Rihanna in a guest role and she dates Joshua Malina's character.

• There are seven arbitration-eligible players on the Twins' roster and December 2 is the deadline to tender them contracts for 2015, so I tried to figure out what they should do with each one.

• Baseball America released its annual list of the Twins' top 10 prospects, with the same top five as last year in a slightly different order.

• An example of why Parker Hageman of Twins Daily is so good: He breaks down potential Twins target Justin Masterson using stats, scouting, quotes, and video.

Mike Wise is the latest old white dude to make me sad about eventually becoming one myself.

Marilyn Manson is doing a concert at Mystic Lake casino in February. Imagine that crowd.

Chelsea Peretti's new stand-up special "One of the Greats" is on Netflix and it's predictably fantastic, with lots of funny/weird Easter Egg-type stuff thrown in.

• One of my favorite comedians, John Mulaney, was a good guest on "WTF" with Marc Maron.

• Restaurant recommendation: Black Sheep Pizza in North Loop lived up to the considerable hype.

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Highland Park robbery video"
- "Baseball movie with Gilbert Gottfried"
- "Eddie Guardado speaks Spanish"
- "Snoop Dogg jet"
- "Drew Butera girlfriend"
- "Chelsea Peretti dating Denzel Washington"
- "Torii Hunter not such a great guy"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is Isbell doing a live version of "Cover Me Up" on November 18:


This week's blog content is sponsored by Uber, which is offering a free ride to first-time users who sign up with the promo code "UberGleeman."

September 26, 2014

Link-O-Rama

• Yankees announcer Michael Kay gave me a little shoutout on YES Network during Derek Jeter's final home game Thursday night:

And during the same game, on the Orioles' broadcast, they quoted me about J.J. Hardy's value.

• In terms of trolling for truth, "Jay Z was better than Beyonce is" might be even more effective than Keith Olbermann's anti-Jeter tirade.

• Wednesday's rain delay meant Phil Hughes finished one out short of reaching 210 innings for the season to receive a $500,000 bonus. After initially saying they wouldn't the Twins later offered him a chance to pitch in relief during Sunday's season finale ... and Hughes turned it down. Still, considering he set the all-time strikeout-to-walk ratio record in a season worth several times his salary and the rain delay is the only reason he didn't reach the bonus perhaps the Twins should donate the money to charity in his name or something?

Darko Milicic is done with playing basketball and is now a kickboxer. Seriously.

• For combining simplicity and effectiveness you're not going to find a better opening sentence: "Dale Decker is a man who says he orgasms in his pants over 100 times per day."

• Legalizing marijuana in Minnesota could raise enough revenue in one year to pay off Ricky Nolasco's entire contract. And everyone would be less stressed out watching his starts, too.

Lauryn Hill at her peak was an inner-circle Hall of Fame talent, but this is why I couldn't talk myself into paying $65 per ticket to see her at First Avenue earlier this year.

• I tore my ACL walking from CC Club to VFW two minutes after turning down a ride and one minute after mocking someone for slipping on ice, but this is arguably an even dumber way.

• Oh god. Minneapolis/St. Paul Business Journal has an article about John Bonnes and he looks all annoyingly super happy in the photo.

• Friends of AG.com and "No Juice Podcast" co-hosts Dan Anderson and Parker Hageman tried to show what it's like to pitch-frame a 100-mph fastball. It did not go well:

"You're gonna be on the whacking DL for a while" is a great line. (Also: They couldn't hit it either.)

• Read this Ben Lindbergh article about the Pirates' extensive use of sabermetrics and tell me the Twins aren't at a basic, fundamental disadvantage.

• Who will the Twins purge from the 40-man roster? Almost half of the players are droppable.

• My big takeaway from Mitch Williams' lawsuit is that MLB Network was paying him $2 million.

Benjy Bronk from Howard Stern's show is the guy who got tossed from Roger Goodell's press conference, which should not surprise any longtime Stern fans.

• My blog-mate Craig Calcaterra is one of 24 writers selected for Amtrak's residency program.

Andrew Baggarly is one of the best, most experienced baseball reporters around, but the San Francisco Giants are boycotting him for reporting something no one seems to deny happened.

• In addition to being dashingly handsome to the point of intimidation, Steve "Randball's Stu" Neuman tells a really good story.

• It turns out the new iPhones could be big news for schlubby guys.

• Chicago deep-dish pizza chain restaurant Giordano's is coming to Uptown, just a few doors down from Green Mill.

• Restaurant recommendation: The Bad Waitress has become one of my go-to spots. It's great for my fellow breakfast-for-dinner lovers and it's on Bite Squad.

• I still need two more owners for my "Hardball Dynasty" league on WhatIfSports. Details here.

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Happy dirty thirty"
- "Ron Gardenhire contract"
- "How much does Joe Nathan make per game?"
- "Who did the Nationals trade for Wilson Ramos?"
- "Marney Gellner rain delay dance"
- "Bill Smith on Seinfeld"
- "Is Justin Morneau French?"

• Finally, in honor of Jeter's retirement this week's AG.com-approved music video is "The Captain" by Kasey Chambers:


This week's blog content is sponsored by Uber, which is offering a free ride to first-time users who sign up with the promo code "UberGleeman."

September 12, 2014

Link-O-Rama

• Every night at the Arby's in Uptown at least one doofus tries to use the drive-through on foot and I've never once thought "I bet that's a fugitive."

• Can someone please tell Gwyneth Paltrow thanks but not thanks. We're all set.

Taylor Swift and Katy Perry are feuding over John Mayer, whose music I've consistently been mocked for liking since 2002.

• This is wonderful, but after seven decades together I'll bet they already have a gravy boat.

• On this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode I talked/argued with David Brauer and John Bonnes about whether the Twins' management saying "we get it" means a damn thing.

• I was convinced Ben Revere would never hit an over-the-fence home run in the majors, but now he has two of them and the most recent one tied the game with two outs and two strikes in the ninth inning:

Revere has hit .307 in two seasons with the Phillies, but still has a sub-.700 OPS.

• I want this 26,000-hour DVR, just for "Chopped" episodes.

• McDonald's has applied to trademark the word "McBrunch." Their mimosas could be interesting.

• I thank god for this every day.

• If you watch this GIF of per-capita cigarette sales from 1972 to 2012 it's almost like people realized at some point they weren't good for you.

• How does Danny Santana compare to the other standout rookies in Twins history?

Vladimir Guerrero has a 15-year-old son, 6-foot-2, 220-pound Vladimir Jr., who's already working out for MLB teams in the Dominican Republic:

Guerrero played his first full season in the majors when I was 15 years old. I feel very old.

• As a kid I had plenty of logo-clad yarmulkes, but Chief Wahoo seems like a bad choice.

• A lawsuit claims the Mets fired a woman because she had a baby out of wedlock. Seriously.

• Having been to many of the bars in this "The Best Places To Watch Each Pro Football Team In Minnesota" article it sure seems like they assigned teams randomly.

• Cardinals linebacker John Abraham, the NFL's active leader in sacks, "is suffering from severe memory loss and has been for more than a year." He is 36 years old.

Parker Hageman and Dan Anderson are apparently shooting video to accompany their "No Juice Podcast" episodes, which I can assure you is not something being considered for "Gleeman and The Geek."

Hannibal Buress was a funny guest on "Late Night" with Seth Meyers:

Fedora basketball seriously sounds like a great idea.

• Old friend Francisco Liriano and his filthy slider are dominating again, for the Pirates.

• My colleague Craig Calcaterra wrote a billion or so words about the "baseball is dying" silliness.

• I still need two more owners for my "Hardball Dynasty" league on WhatIfSports. Details here.

• My latest television obsession is "Property Brothers" on HGTV. Highly recommended and oddly addictive, with Canadian accents to boot.

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Upped usages"
- "Hunan chicken Weight Watchers points"
- "Head-first slide"
- "How will Joe Mauer be remembered?"
- "Will Ron Gardenhire be fired?"
- "Hawk Harrelson net worth"
- "Kevin Slowey fan mail"
- "Weakness in baseball"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is the Mayer-Perry duet "Who You Love":


This week's blog content is sponsored by Uber, which is offering a free ride to first-time users who sign up with the promo code "UberGleeman."

August 22, 2014

Link-O-Rama

Ron Gardenhire admitted to knowing of Fan Graphs and, despite this being 2014 and his being a highly paid baseball manager, everyone was rightfully shocked. Which is funny, but also not.

• I mean, did someone really "fake their own death" if one phone call to their parents immediately blows up the entire scheme?

• The American Reader examined how "bae" became a thing people say.

Phil Hughes, Ace. (Seriously.)

• One of my favorite writers, Gaby Dunn, put together an amusing Jezebel post about "ghosting" people via text, which I've regretfully done twice and constantly feel guilty about.

Pat Neshek gave up his number so John Lackey could keep wearing No. 41 after being traded from the Red Sox to the Cardinals and in return he received a ball autographed by Babe Ruth.

• On this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode I finally got rid of John Bonnes.

• Comedy Central just made the entire first season of "Broad City" available online and I liked it so much I'm re-watching the whole thing. Here's a scene featuring Hannibal Buress:

Ilana and Lincoln might be the best couple on television.

• You'd think people mistakenly getting into random cars believing they'd paid the driver to pick them up would be crazy, but as someone who now uses Uber and Lyft regularly it makes sense.

Chipper Jones randomly bumped into Manny Ramirez at the Des Moines airport.

• Indians righty Corey Kluber came out of nowhere to become one of baseball's best pitchers and Jordan Bastian of MLB.com deftly mixed reporting and analysis to see how that happened.

• Good job, y'all. Negative feedback made Blue Plate Restaurants get rid of the "minimum wage" fee and increase their servers' base pay.

• This week's "Gleeman and The Geek" guest co-host, Parker Hageman, has his own podcast called "The No Juice Podcast" and I generally find it very amusing.

• Another catcher whose career may be in jeopardy due to concussions from foul tips.

• Thought Catalog occasionally has some interesting stuff and has given quite a few good writers their first sizable audience, but things have gotten pretty disgusting there lately.

• Sadly, it didn't work.

• Friend of AG.com Dana Wessel is back writing his weekly Premier League column for the Minneapolis Star Tribune's website.

• New Bohemia in Northeast has been a big supporter of "Gleeman and The Geek" and now the beer-and-sausage house is opening a second location in Golden Valley.

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Roy Smalley, baseball player"
- "Your favorite Coen brothers movies"
- "What is Scott Ullger good at?"
- "Sad guy sitting alone in restaurant"
- "How much does Joe Nathan make per inning?"
- "Where did Nick Blackburn go?"
- "Are the suites at Target Field air-conditioned?"
- "Weight loss Zubaz"

• Finally, in honor of the Twins Daily light rail pub crawl Saturday this week's AG.com-approved music video is "Fast Train" by Solomon Burke:


This week's blog content is sponsored by Uber, which is offering a free ride to first-time users who sign up with the promo code "UberGleeman."

August 18, 2014

Gleeman and The Geek #158: Just a Concussion and The Purge

Topics for this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode included trading Josh Willingham to the Royals, Byron Buxton's incredibly scary injury, what to expect from Ricky Nolasco, where Danny Santana should be playing defensively, what to make of Oswaldo Arcia through one full season, appreciating Phil Hughes' excellence, the launch of Vikings Journal, and whether or not to freak out about hair in your food.

Gleeman and The Geek: Episode 158

In addition to the direct download link above you can also subscribe to the podcast via iTunes.


This week's blog content is sponsored by Uber, which is offering a free ride to first-time users who sign up with the promo code "UberGleeman."

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