AaronGleeman.com

• I'd say Otis Nixon's mugshot is a pretty compelling argument against using crack cocaine, but even in his baseball-playing prime he always looked 60 years old.

• Glen Perkins' sabermetric legend continues to grow. Not only did he go through his advanced stats one-by-one and explain them all, he's trying to convert other Twins pitchers into stat-heads.

• Like that old saying goes, be careful whose urine you borrow.

• See, now this is why I'm scared to sign up for J-Date.

• Science is cool and all, but I've got about 15 years of personal evidence to the contrary.

• Who were the best Twins prospects of the 2000s and how did they turn out?

• Growing up my friends and I probably watched/rented "Kids" a dozen times, so 18 years after the controversial movie was made it's fascinating and also sad to read about the actors' lives.

• Speaking of movies I loved as a kid, "Hoop Dreams" co-star William Gates' son is going to play Division I college basketball.

• On a related note, I was talking with people on Twitter about my favorite movies and came up with this preliminary list:

1. "Seven"
2. "The Godfather"
3. "No Country For Old Men"
4. "Pulp Fiction"
5. "Boogie Nights"
6. "Blue Valentine"
7. "The Shawshank Redemption"
8. "Memento"
9. "Dog Day Afternoon"
10. "Hoop Dreams"

I'm probably forgetting one or two because I didn't put a whole lot of thought into the initial list, but I might spend a little more time on it and come up with a top 50. Also, looking at those 10 movies apparently I only like comedy on television.

• On this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode we got kicked off the radio.

• If you like "Between Two Ferns" with Zach Galifianakis you'll really like "Between Two Ferns" with Zach Galifianakis when his James Franco interview turns into a Lonely Island video:

"Of all the art projects that you've done, what has made people roll their eyes the hardest?"

• In addition to being a former Official Fantasy Girl of AG.com, Elisha Cuthbert is a world-class eye-roller at hockey games.

• I'm one of those Blackberry-using weirdos, but this may finally convince me to get an iPhone.

• Setting aside the fact that he didn't actually tag the runner, this is a pretty amazing play by a 6-foot-5 catcher.

• As someone who recently lost 150 pounds strictly through diet/exercise and is now struggling to keep the weight off I'm fascinated by Chris Christie opting for surgery. I don't blame him, since I considered doing the same at times when obesity felt impossible to conquer, but the relapse rate for surgery is frighteningly high and trying to keep the surgery secret suggests he's not thrilled with what the choice says about him. Beating obesity sadly isn't as simple as losing weight.

• How did nachos and cheese become a ballpark staple?

• Wearing glasses is increasingly popular among people who don't actually need glasses, but as someone who's been wearing them since ninth grade I nodded along to almost every item here.

• Did you know that Twins Daily blogger Parker Hageman was in "Tiger Beat" magazine?

• During my weekly appearance on KFAN with Paul Allen we discussed the Twins, but also the etiquette of following and unfollowing people on Twitter. And also how my mom is stalking him.

• As far as Ron Gardenhire quotes go, I think I like "we're heroes on the internet" even more than "fire it through the internet." Also, he's officially too self-aware now. Not as much fun.

• I'll watch any video in which comedians make jokes while drinking too much, especially if they star Kyle Kinane:

"Just a case of the spits."

• Todd Barry's podcast is only three episodes old, but it's already become one of my favorites. Good, laid-back conversations with funny, interesting people who aren't regulars in the comedy podcasting world. This week's chat with Julieanne Smolinski was particularly enjoyable.

• "Community" fans should definitely check out "WTF" with Marc Maron this week, because he talked to Gillian Jacobs one day and Alison Brie a couple days later. They were both great.

• If you've never listened to "Comedy Bang Bang" before this week's fourth-anniversary episode is a perfect representation of the show.

• Netflix documentary recommendation: "The Restauranteur" about businessman and restaurant mogul Danny Meyer, featuring "Top Chef" judge Tom Colicchio with hair.

• "Parks and Recreation" creator Michael Schur, who's also known as Ken Tremendous from his "Fire Joe Morgan" blogging days, has created a new FOX show co-starring Official Fantasy Girl of AG.com candidate Chelsea Peretti and the always great Andre Braugher.

• Oh, and NBC renewed "Parks and Recreation" for another season.

• My favorite cheesy reality show, "Bar Rescue" on Spike, is back for another 20 episodes.

• "The Sportive" was good this week because Holly Manthei was such a great guest that she carried everyone else.

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Jay R. Ferguson shirtless"
- "I love Bob Einstein"
- "Scott Diamond Jew"
- "Casey Fien Jewish"
- "Ryan Doumit Jewish"
- "Jon Taffer hair transplants"
- "Where is Drew Butera playing baseball?"
- "Where can I find naked picture of Scott Conant?"
- "Matt Capps dating"
- "Matt Harvey's sister"
- "Mae Whitman monologues"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is "Still Not a Player" by Big Punisher:

This week's blog content is sponsored by Curt's Salsa, a locally owned salsa company that believes in fresh ingredients and rooting for the little guy. Please support them for supporting AG.com.

• Trent Reznor and Carly Rae Jepsen don't know it, but they made a catchy song together.

• I can finally put all those pointless years of Hebrew school to some use and read it (from right to left) for the articles.

• Last week Nikola Pekovic met Zach Galifianakis, so this week he dressed up as him.

• I'm loving David Brauer's "returning to college as a 53-year-old" updates.

• Louis C.K. and Hank Aaron were on "Late Night With Conan O'Brien" together in 1993.

• This is the quickest I've ever deleted an e-mail.

• I'm guessing we'll probably never see Terry Ryan do this.

• Aaron Hicks had a decent Thursday afternoon, if you're into that type of thing.

• And to think, a day earlier some idiot claimed the Twins have three prospects better than Hicks.

• This week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode features lengthy discussions on Ron Gardenhire's future with the Twins and why Liam Hendriks could be the top Australian pitcher ever.

• Last week in this space I wondered if it was finally time to replace Mila Kunis as Official Fantasy Girl of AG.com and then she went and did this:

To be clear: I'm not the interviewer in that video, but I certainly could have been.

• Speaking of which: Back off, LeBron.

• News story lead sentence of the week: "A quick-thinking worker at Dunkin' Donuts threw hot coffee at a man who tried to climb through the drive-through window to rob the store, telling him 'go run on Dunkin'' as he fled."

• Blake Griffin and Jamal Crawford teamed up for an in-game dunk better than anything in the dunk contest, and Griffin's reaction afterward is pretty good too.

• Sad, disturbing details about the death of a Nationals prospect in the Dominican Republic.

• Torii Hunter may disagree, but Justin Verlander says the Tigers' clubhouse would be a good atmosphere for a gay teammate.

• I almost like the 1995 opening of "Breaking Bad" better, if only for the Foreigner.

• This is what happens when a blogger leaves the house.

• I used to think Barry Bonds posting a .480 on-base percentage at age 42 was amazing, but then I learned Nigella Lawson is 53. On a related note, I've been watching "The Taste" on ABC despite the fact that it's not a very compelling show.

• An eating contest involving seafood seems to be asking for trouble. And it definitely got it.

• As a fan of comedy, women, Jews, and working from bed this is basically the perfect video:

Joan Rivers and Sarah Silverman are so great together that I sent the link to my grandma.

• Fank you to whoever put together this Adele video.

• Delmon Young is making fast friends with another group of media members.

• I watched "Chelsea Lately" for the first (and probably last) time and this GIF explains why.

• My mom, who apparently watches "Chelsea Lately" regularly, offered this unsolicited review.

• Agents are agents in fake baseball too.

• Carson Cistulli's weekly chat with Dayn Perry was spectacular, as usual.

• Congrats to my former The Hardball Times partner, Dave Studeman, for winning this year's "Analytics Research Award" from SABR.

• Podcast recommendation: "The Crab Feast" with Jay Larson and Ryan Sickler. Get started with a Jen Kirkman episode, because she's always a can't-miss podcast guest.

• Mark your calendars: Twins Daily is having a get-together/viewing party on March 23 to watch the Saturday afternoon Twins-Rays spring training game on television. Starting at noon we'll be hanging out at 612 Brew in Northeast Minneapolis, drinking beer and talking baseball.

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Marney Gellner age"
- "Will Chinese buffet kill my Atkins diet?"
- "I'm 29 years old and lost"
- "Corey Koskie net worth"
- "Chuck Berry and Sammy Sosa"
- "Brian Dinkelman girlfriend"
- "Is Terry Gross a baseball fan?"
- "How much does Louis C.K. weigh?"
- "Anthony Slama's mom"
- "Gleeman fashion"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is "Sweet Wanomi" by Bill Withers:

This week's blog content is sponsored by Rotoworld's annual "Fantasy Baseball Draft Guide," which is available in both magazine and online versions. Please support them for supporting AG.com.

• Glen Perkins took Joe Posnanski pitch-by-pitch through a recent save against the Yankees and it was a great read for a whole bunch of different reasons.

• My favorite headline of the week/weak: "Wisconsin man busted for curbside sex with couch."

• Mental Floss did an incredible amount of research to basically show my childhood was a lie.

• At this point Mila Kunis is putting her Official Fantasy Girl of AG.com title at serious risk.

• Based on a Wall Street Journal study MLB's most biased announcer ... well, you may want to sit down for this shocking revelation.

• Louis C.K. hates wearing a suit, but it was probably worth it just for this one picture.

• An alternate headline for this news story could have been: "Why people still watched the NFL even though the replacement referees were a complete joke." Gambling is a helluva drug.

• Congratulations to my blog-mate Craig Calcaterra for his well-deserved spot on this prestigious list. My tweet game remains flawless, of course.

• And then Calcaterra went and got himself on Deadspin again for an even better reason.

• Torii Hunter Jr., a top-ranked high school wide receiver from Texas, has committed to play football (and baseball) at Notre Dame.

• How did the Twins' pitching become such a mess? I'm glad you asked.

• It takes a very special talent to make a legal deposition worth watching and Lil Wayne is that very special talent:

"He can't save you" is a phrase I'm going to work into my everyday usage.

• All things considered the "Full House" cast holds up pretty well 25 years later and I'm happy that Lori Loughlin remains the show's best-looking (non-John Stamos) person at age 48.

• David Simon revealed that HBO once turned down a spinoff of "The Wire" that would been all about Tommy Carcetti's political career. Dang.

• For some reason this kind of reminds me of Paul Allen and "Girls Gone Gleeman."

• My mom's review of this week's "Gleeman and The Geek" episode: "I liked it because it sounded like you guys drank a lot."

• Also, for anyone who already listened to this week's podcast: Kate Agnew, whom we mention as being, among other things, diabolical, blogs at Kate's A Cliche.

• An update for anyone interested in the nuts and bolts of "Gleeman and The Geek": Our last eight episodes have averaged 9,600 downloads, including at least 7,500 per show. That's way above and beyond our wildest expectations and it's great to know the audience hasn't ditched us since shifting back to podcast-only mode after six months on the radio. Thanks to everyone who listens and please keep recommending it to new people throughout the offseason.

• Two things are for sure: One, this definitely isn't too little too late. Two, that was sarcasm.

• My instincts that told me not to bother seeing "Trouble With The Curve" seem to be correct.

• Never forget the night Manute Bol started launching three-pointers, because I won't.

• Kevin Love is the new Jon Rauch.

• Perhaps the last strong candidate for "catch of the season" came from an unlikely candidate.

• SABR announced the dates for next year's convention in Philadelphia, so you know where I'll be from July 31 to August 4 even if being on a vacation during the trade deadline is tricky.

• "Stop Podcasting Yourself" has become my favorite podcast and this week's show with stand-up comedian Kyle Kinane as their guest was especially good.

• Zach Galifianakis' appearance on "Who Charted" was podcasting at its finest, including his appraisal of "Lights" by Ellie Goulding: "That song seems like it was sung by a woman who talks about tree houses a lot."

• Netflix instant recommendation: "Neds," which is a Scottish film about unstable families, gangs, bullies, and how things can unravel in a hurry for a kid thrown into the fire. Really good.

• I found the best IMDB page, in case you were wondering.

• Ben Collin is one of the most creative Twins bloggers around, but he's also a meteorologist and weather-related software developer looking for work.

• Some of this week's weird and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Rob Dibble ex-wife"
- "Ate fried rice and lost weight"
- "Bernardo Brito"
- "Glen Perkins hazing"
- "How to lose pounds on a scale"
- "Women wearing baseball caps"
- "Nick Punto false hustle"
- "How much does Louis C.K. weigh?"
- "Sergeant Slaughter porn"
- "Knife-throwing injuries"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is "Mr. Carter" by my favorite deponent, Lil Wayne, and featuring Jay-Z:

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• If you thought Tom Hardy was hard to understand as Bane, wait until you hear the original.

• Official Fantasy Girl of AG.com candidate Aubrey Plaza seems nice.

• Delmon Young is back in court and looking for a plea deal in his hate crime case. Mazel tov!

• Lew Ford is 35 years old and back in the majors for the first time since 2007.

• My mom sent me this link and wrote "could be trouble."

• And then about three minutes later she sent me this link and wrote "sorry."

• Let this be a lesson to local mainstream media: Being nice to bloggers is good for business.

• Nine rejections, one chip on your shoulder, and zero other ideas can make you do something for 10 years. Thankfully.

• Speaking of which, can I use all you guys as references? Fingers crossed!

• My blogging debut on August 1, 2002 was about the Marlins overworking A.J. Burnett. One day short of exactly 10 years later Burnett threw a one-hit shutout.

• This is the perfect tweet, obviously.

• Vin Scully + Twitter = adorable:

I still tune into Dodgers games almost every night just to hear him, at age 84.

• Maybe things get polished a little bit in translation, but Andrei Kirilenko comes across as incredibly smart in this interview about signing with the Timberwolves.

• Guess who leads the AL in homers, RBIs, slugging percentage, and OPS since May 15?

• Amanda Dobbins examined if The Cutting Edge holds up 20 years later, which reminded me that I watched it at least 10 times on television as a kid and had a crush on Moira Kelly.

• Speaking of movies I've seen on TV double-digit times, Super Troopers is getting a sequel.

• I never know what topics Paul Allen has in mind when I show up to KFAN's studio and this week we ended up talking about our respective food issues and my weight loss quite a bit.

• For anyone who heard the aforementioned weight loss discussion on KFAN yesterday and wants to know more about my story, click here.

• My bourbon-drinking buddy Cee Angi has a very interesting article about the role of gender in baseball writing.

• I'm ashamed and disgusted to admit how charmed I was by this conversation between Carson Cistulli and Dayn Perry.

• Parker Posey had a great guest role on Louie and did an interview with Grantland about the experience which she ended by asking: "Why isn't there more ping-pong on television?"

• Glen Perkins shared some unique insight into the trade deadline experience.

• If you missed my analysis of the Francisco Liriano trade, I wrote a bunch of words about it and also talked a bunch about it on the radio.

• I'm convinced Paul F. Tompkins deserves a talk show, but these videos will have to suffice:

Zach Galifianakis is pretty good too, of course.

• My all-time favorite podcast guest, Chelsea Peretti, was predictably great on Alison Rosen Is Your New Best Friend.

• I was way too excited for Sunday's season premiere of Bar Rescue, which is my favorite cheesy reality show. You can watch the episodes online and fall in love with Jon Taffer.

• As someone who attended the annual National Sports Collectors Convention a handful of times as a kid, I can only imagine the crazy scene there as this happened.

• I got a nice e-mail from Steve Braun after he read my profile ranking him as the 35th-best player in Twins history. Now if only I had enough free time to finish the series. (Sorry.)

• UFC fans will enjoy watching Tito Ortiz's informal, two-hour conversation with Joe Rogan. It really changed the way I think of him.

• Netflix instant recommendation: Goon, which charmed me despite a shaky start.

• In terms of great Jon Hamm guest roles, this might be even better than his 30 Rock stint.

• Artie Lange, Todd Barry, and Greg Fitzsimmons was podcasting magic (and also filthy).

• Having dealt with them in the past, Metro Magazine closing up shop is sad but not surprising.

• Back by popular demand, this week's most amusing, weird, and random search engine queries that brought people here:

- "Aaron Gleeman fat"
- "Dick Bremer salary"
- "Binge once a week weight loss"
- "Aaron Gleeman chicken"
- "Jerome Felton girlfriend"
- "Hormel chicken packaging"
- "Rob McElhenney exact weight"
- "Yuengling in Minneapolis"
- "Mustache dresser games"
- "Back hair baseball jersey"
- "Jason Kubel's sister"
- "Jon Rauch tattoos"
- "Paul Charchian versus Karl Pilkington"

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is a live version of "I Can't Hear You" by The Dead Weather:

This week's blog content is sponsored by the local B&B Blog, a top 20 accounting blog and "the most fascinating accounting blog in the world." Please support them for supporting AG.com.

This week's Link-O-Rama is sponsored by the Minnesota band Shoveldance, so please help support AG.com by checking out their new album ...

• Joe Mauer and his girlfriend received the paparazzi treatment in Duluth, of all places.

• Justin Timberlake got my vote for All-Star game MVP after trolling Joe Buck on the air.

• And runner-up on my MVP ballot was Kate Upton for her performance in the celebrity game.

• I've never hung out in Miami with Minka Kelly (yet!), but did see enough of the All-Star game to say Derek Jeter made the correct choice.

• I'm not usually big on collecting bobblehead dolls, but the set of all 25 players from the 1991 championship team being offered by the Twins next week looks pretty great. Hint. Hint. Hint.

• Take away the beard and Zach Galifianakis is just a nerdy looking high school kid. Literally.

• Mila Kunis is on the cover of the latest GQ magazine and not only does the Official Fantasy Girl of AG.com look spectacular enough to make iced coffee an effective photo shoot prop, the first word she utters in the accompanying interview is "oy." She may hold the title for a while.

• Meanwhile, not everyone is as comfortable speaking Yiddish.

• As great as the Kunis cover is, it might not even be the best photo shoot in this month's GQ.

• I'm glad to see Stringer Bell and Omar Little could settle their differences in the afterlife.

• Best opening paragraph of the year? "A Russian man who tried to rob a hair salon ended up as the victim when the female shop owner overpowered him, tied him up naked and then used him as a sex slave for three days." On a related note, robberies are up 500 percent in Russia.

• Let's hope Bryce Harper's plate discipline proves better than his tattoo discipline.

• For those of us with clear eyes and full hearts Robert Mays' oral history of Friday Night Lights on Grantland is pretty spectacular.

• Also spectacular? This collection of every "y'all" from Connie Britton:

Definitely one of the best moms in television history.

• And just like that, another blogger was born.

• Slideshows usually annoy me, but I'll make an exception for Aubrey Plaza.

• My aunt, Jane Gallop, has a new book out that everyone should buy. Here's a review quote:

Gallop is one of the small handful of critics who are keeping close reading alive. With this volume, she illuminates the stakes in paying such careful and loving attention to the words by which writers are turned, and turn themselves, into authors: stakes made visible on the relational field joining reader and author in an intimate bond that’s desirous, companionate, aggressive, indecent, sustaining, disturbing, unstable, and, when elaborated by a critic and thinker as gifted and incisive as Jane Gallop, also endlessly productive.

She's also a great aunt and has been incredibly supportive of my writing career, so order it.

• It's official: America's Next Great Restaurant is the most misleading title in television history.

• My first thought after reading this story? Hopefully this guy isn't as annoying as John Wayne Bobbitt was during his 15 minutes of fame in the 1990s. Also, ouch.

• Thanks to the internet I didn't have to watch the ESPYs to know Serena Williams was there.

• Last week I heard Scott Boras discuss "managing the media" during his speech at the SABR convention, so suffice it to say his latest headline grab doesn't surprise me.

• This could be an interesting way for mainstream media sites to make their comment sections less mind-meltingly awful, if only since it removes the ever-dangerous anonymity from the mix.

• Zach Lowe of SI.com wrote a nice piece on why David Kahn's ongoing push for an up-tempo offense is, like many things he says and does, sort of silly.

• My idol Tom Scharpling took a break from steamrolling chumps to be interviewed by AV Club.

• Podcast recommendation: Julie Klausner's predictably charming and hilarious appearance on "Jordan, Jesse, Go!" with Jesse Thorn and Jordan Morris. And her own podcast is great too.

• ESPN3.com is showing live coverage of the World Series of Poker main event all weekend.

• Matt Kemp and I live basically the same life.

• My perception is skewed by spending a week at ballparks in California, but it occurred to me that fewer men and more women wearing baseball hats would make the world a better place.

• One of the upcoming sponsors of the week had to delay their date, so if anyone is interested in stepping in to sponsor the week of July 25-31 click here for details and let me know.

• Finally, in honor of my fantastic trip to Long Beach and the surprising lack of drama in the LBC this week's AG.com-approved music video is Snoop Dogg with a live version of "Gin and Juice":