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• The only good thing to come out of the riots in Vancouver was this photo.

• If an 85-year-old pornography kingpin and his 25-year-old model girlfriend can't make it work what chance do the rest of us have?

• Journalistically the GQ profile of actor Chris Evans was messy, but it sure was a fun read and makes me reconsider all my ideas about the name Edith.

• Based on this story, my advice for anyone vacationing in Mexico is to bring your own hammer and avoid riding the bus, although in fairness that's basically my advice about going anywhere.

• Ozzie Guillen has a new nickname for the Twins.

• Confession time: I'm actually a lesbian, so ultimately it all evens out in the blogging world.

• Speaking of which, it turns out there's actually something that Target Field diminishes even more than home runs: Grab ass.

• First he groped the Official Fantasy Girl of AG.com on television and now this. Bastard.

• I'm a sucker for movie lists and the 50 best final lines is no exception.

• I'm not sure what the final line of the Moneyball movie will be, but the extended trailer is out:

It looks like a cross between Major League and Friday Night Lights, with Brad Pitt doing all sorts of Brad Pitt-like things playing Billy Beane and lots of details that will probably annoy anyone who read the book (or simply knows anything about baseball). If nothing else Chris Pratt from Parks and Recreation playing Scott Hatteberg should be amusing.

• As a frequent Perkins take-out customer and all-around breakfast food enthusiast I'll assume my going on a diet led directly to this. Sorry.

• Speaking of breakfast food enthusiasts, behold: The many faces of Ron Swanson.

• This news comes as no surprise after America's Next Great Restaurant chose the wrong idea and then ruined the concept they did pick by forcing it to be "healthy." Plus, reviews of the Mall of America location were very negative. When in doubt, go with grilled cheese.

• Cecil Fielder has been able to fool new writers every season, but Prince Fielder still wants nothing to do with him.

• Pippa Middleton is newly single. Does anyone have her number? I've heard she's super into arguments about Francisco Liriano.

• I'm guessing the kids might have a slightly different take some day.

• Jon Bois of SB Nation brilliantly breaks down the world of pickup basketball.

• I've started watching the BBC series Luther on Netflix, which is very well done and makes me wonder (again) why the hell Idris Elba isn't in everything, ever.

• Not only is stand-up comic Anthony Jeselnik friends with my Rotoworld and NBC colleague Gregg Rosenthal, he also did a great set on Conan:

His impression of Dane Cook is pretty great too.

• As someone who just booked a $450 flight to California for the upcoming SABR convention, this seems a little excessive. Incidentally, if any AG.com readers are going to be in Long Beach for the festivities next month please let me know.

• Anthony Weiner is out of a job, but not before he made Ginger Lee one of the world's most famous porn stars.

• A.J. Pierzynski explained that Gavin Floyd can't hold runners, but forgot to mention that he can't throw anyone out no matter who's pitching.

• Congratulations to Mark Cuban, who's probably even happier now than that time he out-bid those other rich guys on Shark Tank.

• Dirk Nowitzki wearing hipster glasses plus Brian Cardinal in all his glory equals my favorite non-Cuban picture from the Mavericks' post-title celebration.

• Marc Maron might be taking his must-listen podcast to television. Sort of.

• Podcast recommendation of the week: Brian Posehn talking to Joe Rogan, with video.

• Old friend J.C. Romero was designated for assignment by the Phillies.

• Finally, this week's AG.com-approved music video is "Buttons" by The Weeks: